The Straw That Broke The Pervert’s Back
by Sci-Fi Raptor
Summary: AU: Keitaro's finally had it. Never more will he stand the punishment that he is being delt by the so called Hinata 'girls.' Poor gentle Keitaro's finally snapped. Can the girls pull him out of his cycle of darkness before its too late?
1. The Invincible Pervert!

**Book One: The Straw That Broke The Pervert's Back**

**Chapter One:** The Invincible Pervert!

**By:** Sci-Fi Raptor

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Love Hina or its characters. I do, however, own any characters that I make during the length of this story. Enjoy.

This idea poped up in my head while I read **Love Hina: Showdown by **Lord LeChuck the Wonder W, but is not a copy off of his story in any way. This first chapter is really just a courtesy and the story doesn't really start until somewhere near the end of it. Reading chapter two will really get things started, so at least read up till that till you flame me… (I'm sorry, but this dry presentation seems to work the best to start off the story)

During its developement, this story spawned a daughter story called The Other Me. They have the same exact first three chapters, but they diverge after that. Consider reading it once you've read past chapter three of this fic, though keep in mind that it is rated R and is more of a darker fic then this version. Cheers!

Note: This is set two years after Keitaro first goes into the Hinata-Sou, about a week before his second shot at the entrance exams.

(-O-)

There's a saying that goes something like "the kitchen is kind of the heart of the family." Now if by kitchen, it means the dining room table, it makes sense, since that it the one place everyone consecutively meets and talks together. The case isn't any different for the residents of the Hinata-Sou, formerly the Hinata Inn.

On this particular, everyday morning, the residents all slowly made their way to the table, which was already furnished with a nutritious and tasty breakfast, compliments of Shinobu Maehara (15), the resident cook. As she finished distributing the foot stuffs and utensils, one may notice that she seems to put special love and care for a particular seat, the seat of a particular Sempai. If one were to compare Shinobu to her previous self, one would remark on the extreme changes she had undergone. Thanks to a particular pervert, Shinobu was no longer that shy unconfident girl she was when she originally entered Hinata-Sou. Now she was a vibrant example of youth whose beauty was finally standing out (and being noticed by the boys in her grade, thought for _some_ reason she kept rejecting any offers they made).

"Someone seems a bit giddy," someone said in an insinuating tone to Shinobu as she passed by her Sempai's seat.

"I j-just wanted to thank Sempai for helping be get such a high mark on my last test," she says, blushing wildly.

"Really?" Mitsune Konno (21) says with a foxy grin, which coincidentally explains the reason for her nickname Kitsune (fox). Kitsune, the resident couch potato, likes to spend her life incessantly drinking, getting into other people's lives and a certain pervert's wallet.

"That is really uncalled for." Motoko Aoyama (18) says coolly. Kitsune glares daggers at her for ruining her fun, but she shrugs it off. Always calm and collected, Motoko is a shining example of what a warrior raised in the way of the God's Cry school should be, though internally she is still a confused teen trying to get control of her recently arising hormones and emotions. She had an acute skill with her sword, having the ability to neatly cut falling leaves and never hesitates to use it in the name of protecting the other girls from the local sex fiend. She is deathly afraid of turtles

"Is 'uncalled for' yummy?" Su Koallo (15) ponders from her latched position on Motoko's back. No one pays her mind. Though young and extremely hyper, Su is a genius, who constantly creates advanced (though twisted) inventions that she loves to test on her favorite "playmate," who apparently has a strange likeness to her brother. She also has a strange fixation upon bananas and the resident turtle.

"You don't eat it, idiot!" Sarah McDougal (11) sharply says to her. She was left behind by Seta as he was off exploring yet another ruin. She likes to map out the secret tunnels of Hinata-Sou with Su. She also enjoys hitting a certain dork with artifacts and generally terrorizing him.

"Ara, ara, I wonder where Keitaro and Naru are?"Mutsumi Otohime commented, noticing that the normal chaos was missing a certain something. Mutsumi was almost as strange as Su and seemed to be the female version of a certain pervert. She had a tendency to faint due to her fragile health, randomly kisses people and has a strange fixation with watermelons. One of her more strange qualities was that she was a third year ronin that would have gotten in had she not fainted on the way to the testing center or forgotten to put her name down.

Coincidentally, the said missing persons also happened to be ronins. Narusegawa Naru (19) had actually ranked first on the national mock exams, but had somehow failed the real thing. She was a very temperamental and quixotically strong woman who could somehow send perverts flying into the stratosphere.

Speaking of perverts flying, the local one was once again launched into the atmosphere, causing the house to tremble a little, from the impact of flooring and roofing being ripped through and possibly from fear. Naru made her way to her seat and sat down to eat as if were a normal day. Everyone else acted as if were a normal event and finished eating, though Shinobu seemed to be _slightly_ agitated by how high Keitaro was going.

Now there's a character: Keitaro Urashima (22), virgin. Some would say bad luck personified. 17 years ago, he made a childhood promise in which he vowed to get into Todai (Tokyo University). Ever since, he's been trying to get in, though he hasn't had much luck; until recently. After becoming the landlord of Hinata-Sou, which happens to be an all-girl's dormitory, he finally started getting decent scores with the help of Naru and later, Mutsumi.

One would think that the idea of a male in an all-girl's dormitory is appalling, and trust me, most of the tenants thought the same in the beginning. Due to Keitaro's amazing accident-prone nature and his unbelievable ability of going to the wrong place at the wrong time and touching the wrong areas during his 'accidents,' Naru and Motoko constantly bangs around Keitaro. No man would normally survive under the conditions he has to face, be it punishment, incessant chores or emotional stress, but Keitaro is no normal man… or mortal. Keitaro Urishima seems to have an indestructible nature, which should explain to any outsider why his tenants treat him as such and feel no remorse. Besides, deep down inside, Keitaro and the girls are all a family and love each other very much.

Love is a very strange thing though and none of the tenants can readily admit their feelings for him. Naru, who unconsciously knows she loves him, seems only to be able to express it by causing Keitaro massive pain, which is very similar to Motoko, though she seems slightly more aware of it herself. Shinobu seems to be innocence personified and has a huge crush on her sempai, though she can only express it through her cooking. However all the tenants know about her feelings, except for Keitaro, since he's a dense idiot. The rest just seems to have a familial love for Keitaro, except for Mutsumi, since she used to like him when they were kids. However, she had long since given up her right to love him in a simple game of rock-paper-scissor.

Now, let's focus on our aforementioned star, Keitaro, as he rushes back to the earth.

"Hey, I can see the mall from here…" he says to himself. Suddenly he can feel the wind rushing past to him and for some reason remembers how he got into the situation he is in, in the first place.

(O)

"Narusegawa…" Keitaro says as he uninvitedly goes through the hole connecting his room to hers to ask about a question he has about a test question. Unfortunately (for him at least), he happens to pop in while she is changing. His nose starts bleeding as he gets a good view of her unmentionables.

"Don't you ever get enough?" Naru says angrily and kicks his head like a soccer ball, sending him flying.

(O)

"Dammit…" he says angrily. "She never listens to me. She didn't even give me a chance to explain. I'm starting to get tired of this treatment. Its like all they see me as is a thing for them to use. At least everyone except Shinobu-chan. But I don't know if it's even worth my time any-" he rambls, but is cut off mid sentence as he crashes into a busy highway. Far worse, he happens to get right in front of a speeding truck, which happens to causing him to get bumped onto a speeding car and thrown deeper into the fray. After a few more collisions, he falls into the cargo bed of an SUV and flung off when it screeches to a halt on a red light. Soaring through the air, Keitaro suddenly gains consciousness as he slams face first into the wall of a clinic. Slowly, his body peels off the wall and lands on the ground, leaving a small indent on the wall.

His crumpled form attracts a small crowd of anxious people who wonder what to do next. Someone calls for help and an ambulance comes by shortly thereafter. As the paramedics get ready to put his flattened body onto the stretcher, his arm suddenly comes back to life and he puts his thumb into his mouth and starts blowing. In a few minutes, he is re-inflated and he suddenly jumps up, no scratches whatsoever, and says, "I'm Okay!" and points his index and middle finger up in the shape of a V, his face beaming with pride. Everyone around him falls.

"Damn, you're something kid," one of the paramedics says, giving him a playful slap on the back. Everyone winces when they hear the sharp snap of a bone cracking…

(O)

"Sempai sure is taking a while to get back," Shinobu says worriedly. What she says seems to be an understatement, since its almost sunset.

"Don't worry, he always comes back," Kitsune reassures her. "Its not like he died or anything." She winces at the face Shinobu makes.

"Sempai wouldn't die, would he?" she asks, teary eyed.

"No way," she says confidently. "Keitaro is indestructible! Though Naru did give an awfully strong hit today," she adds, causing Shinobu to become even more upset.

Fortunately for Kitsune, Shinobu calms down when the front door opens and Keitaro quietly announces his entrance. Shinobu excitedly goes up to greet him, but gasps. Kitsune follows suit to investigate what happened and also gasps. Then starts laughing.

Keitaro is frantically trying to take off his shoes with one hand while bent down, since the other is in a cast.

"Had me worried for a second…" Kitsune says to Shinobu, who is frantically running around to make Keitaro's life easier.

"Thanks Shinobu-chan," Keitaro says gratefully, but does not acknowledge Kitsune's presence.

"Keitaro…" she starts, trying to con some more sake out of him, but he simply ignores her and goes to his room. "Shinobu-chan," Keitaro says, still ignoring Kitsune, "can you bring my dinner to my room? I want to study as much as I can between now and the test next week."

"Sure, sempai," Shinobu says and happily runs along. Keitaro goes to his room without another word.

_That's weird. Keitaro was ignoring me. Maybe he got fed up with us always being on his case?_ She thought for a moment, worrying. _Nah, he's probably still just disoriented…_ she convinced herself and went about her daily activities.

(-O-)

Just PLEASE read chapter 2 before you decide to stop reading!!!


	2. Darkness Overwhelming

**Book One: The Straw That Broke The Pervert's Back**

**Chapter Two:** Darkness Overwhelming

**By:** Sci-Fi Raptor

**Disclaimer: **_See Chapter One_

Glad to see you stuck around. I think you'll like this chapter better then the previous. Enjoy.

(-O-)

            The next day seemed to start off as usual. Shinobu goes around, distributing foodstuffs and utensils for breakfast, Kitsune torments her about how she pays so much attention to Keitaro's seat ("He missed yesterday's breakfast," she keeps saying), Su acts hyper while Sarah scolds her, Motoko acts calm, ignoring everyone, Mutsumi acts ditzy, and Naru finally comes downstairs. Everyone notices that a certain idiot isn't following her.

            "Where's Sempai?" Shinobu asks her.

            "Why should I know where that idiot is?" she says, a bit angry at the mention of his existence. "I haven't seen him since last morning."

            "Well, he's usually chasing you around this time," Kistune says insinuatingly.

            "Ara, ara…" Musumi says in agreement.

            "That is a bit odd…" Motoko says, breaking her usual routine of not having anything to do with the mention of her landlord. "Usually he somehow 'accidentally' manages to stumble onto you every morning. Its not like Urishima to skip out on feeling you." Naru blushes, realizing how everyone who resided there took something that would be normally taken as sexual abuse as trivial.

            "I don't care," she says, as if an ultimatum and starts eating. Everyone else, except for Su and Sarah, quiets down and continues eating.

            For no apparent reason, Haruka pops in and grabs something from the table.

            "Hello Haruka-san, what brings you here?" Motoko asks, since she's the first to notice her entrance. Everyone looks at her, since it's not an everyday occurrence for her to join in on breakfast, since she has to wake up early to tend to her teahouse. Speaking of which…

            "I'm here to get that damn turtle girl. She's late…" she says, vein popping when she notices her leisurely eating her breakfast.

            "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't know what time it was. Usually Keitaro is sent flying around the time I have to leave and Naru joins us."

            "Oh yeah," she says, remembering something. "About Keitaro," she starts; everyone's, exempting Su's and Sarah's, ears perked up at the mention of his name. In all reality, they were really anxious about his absence.

            "Where is that jerk?" Naru says angrily. "He never told anyone he was going somewhere… not that I care," she covered.

            "Well, he went off to a clinic to get his cast taken off," she says. Instantly the girls look shocked. Keitaro was invincible; he wasn't one to need such things. Something must have gone terribly wrong if he actually got hurt.

            "What happened to him?" Naru says worriedly.

            "Something about landing in a highway after one of your punches," she says, but is cut off by Naru gasping.

            "Oh my gosh. Was he seriously hurt?" she says, her hands near her mouth.

            "Like I said, he just had a cast. Turns out that it was because someone slapped him in the back that one of his bones cracked," she continued, getting a sigh of relief from Naru (and a sweat drop from everyone else), even though she felt guilty for what she did to him anyway. _At least he's not hurt,_ she thinks, unconciously smiling.

            "But that's not what got me worried about him," she says, grabbing everyone's attention again.

            "Why? What happened?" Motoko says, a _tad_ bit concerned.

            "Well, usually after something like that, he would normally go to Naru and ask her for forgiveness and then go back to his normal happy self, but when he left this morning, he seemed a bit upset and angry."

            "That's really weird…" Kitsune says, seeing that this could be a problem if she were to continue with her plan of seducing Keitaro and 'convincing' him to buy her some sake later that day.

            "But who am I kidding, he was probably just a bit groggy from having to wake up so early. Its probably no big deal," Haruka says, starting to walk out. "And hurry it up already, Mutsumi!"

            "Ara, ara…" she says and quickly finishes her breakfast.

            "Do you think Sempai is mad?" Shinobu says, on the verge of tears.

            "Nah, Keitaro can't stay mad at any of us for too long," Kitsune says, looking at Naru.

            "What?" she says defensively.

            "Nothing…" Kitsune says, in a tone suggesting otherwise.

            "I'm home," Keitaro announces, slamming the door behind him.

            "Sempai!" Shinobu says and runs off to greet him.

            "Maybe I did cross the line this time…" Naru says, a bit nervous at how he slammed the door closed.

(At the entrance)

            "Hello Sempai…" Shinobu started saying, but almost ended up with a whisper when she saw her beloved Sempai.

            "Hello…" Keitaro said grumpily, but quickly apologized for speaking to her as such. "Sorry Shinobu, I already had something to eat while I was out. I'm just gonna go and study, if that's fine with you," he finished, not waiting for an answer.

            "Hai…" Shinobu said uncertainly. Keitaro made his way to his room, obviously in a bad mood. Shinobu went back to the dining room.

            "So, how was he?" Naru asked, a bit nervously.

            "Sempai seems a bit grumpy," she said, choking back tears from their encounter. "And he still had his cast on…"

            "What?" Naru exclaimed. _Maybe I really did go too far this time…_

(O)

            Later that day, at the hot springs, Keitaro lay back to have a nice and relaxing soak. He was finally able to release some of his tension as the heated water seemed to evaporate his troubles away. He gave a sigh of content as he sunk deeper into the pool, careful to keep his bagged arm from going underwater.

            It was nice to just be able to unwind, without having Naru or Motoko sending him flying off to Mars as usual.

            He suddenly remembered that the girls liked to take their bath around this time, but relaxed, remembering that he put a sign up front that he was using the hot springs and even went as far as telling Shinobu to tell everyone. He relaxed his mind, letting the soothing waters melt his stresses away.

            He sat there, thinking about the entrance exam that was a mere few _days_ away. But he felt confident this time. He had studied, and with the help of Naru and Mutsumi (until recently) he had dramatically increased his knowledge.

            He also realized that he hadn't really seen any of the girls except Shinobu since he had been punched miles away. The thought suddenly made him angry for some reason, and he lashed out at the water.

            _Whoa, Keitaro, get a hold of yourself…_ he thought when he noticed this unnatural response. Thinking a bit harder on that, he decided it was the anxiety of the test that was causing him to act like that and that he would be fine when the scores came back. _It would also explain why I got this annoying cast._

            "I don't know, it seems like he's been avoiding us," a feminine voice said, as she entered the hot springs.

            _Oh crap… don't tell me that the girls just came in…_

            "Maybe he's just stressed from the upcoming exams?" Motoko's voice answered. Thinking back a little, Keitaro was sure that the original voice was Naru's (oh yeah, Keitaro doesn't know what they're saying, he just hears noises).

            _Oh man…_ Keitaro thought, starting to panic. He was about he hide so that he could try to escape, but something dawned onto him._ That's right. I'm not the one who's coming in on them this time. They have no reason to susp-_

            His trail of thought was ruined by the shriek of an angry Naru.

            "How many times will it take for you to get enough?!" she said, angrily shaking her fist.

            "Urishima, your perverse ways will not go unpunished!" Motoko exclaimed, drawing her blade out of nowhere.

            "Bull," Keitaro said simply, colder then he knew he could, or even meant to.

            "Huh?" Naru said, caught unawares. Normally, she was supposed to wind up for a punch while Keitaro begs for her to forgive him.

            "Its crap. I specifically put a sign by the door saying that I was using the springs and I even told Shinobu to tell you just in case," he said angrily, not giving any ground. _What's going on? Why am I so angry with them?_

            "S-s-sorry Sempai! I forgot!" Shinobu said out of nowhere, and ran away. Before Motoko cold say anything, Keitaro said.

            "What are you perverts waiting for?" he almost screamed. "You made poor Shinobu cry! Now get out!"

            "B-but…" Motoko stammered, unsure about what was going on. She had never had experience with being called a pervert.

            "Wait, _you're _the reason she's crying," Naru said, trying to get a hold of the situation. "Shinobu's crying because you came in here so you could peek on us!"

            "Shut up!" Keitaro boomed angrily, standing up even though he was fully exposed. Naru froze from the look of pure hatred in his eyes. "I left a sign out there to keep something like this from happening. And stop this crap about me being the pervert. As I recall, _you_ came in on me, not the other way around. Just grow up and learn to take responsibility!" Naru was about to say something, but he cut her off with one last thing. "_GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE ALREADY!_" Motoko quickly left, a look of fear in her face. Naru lowered her head, her hair covering her face.

            "Sorry…" she whispered as she ran away like Shinobu, a trail of tears following her. Within seconds, the room was back to how it was before, save for an atmosphere of hurt.

            "Maybe I went too far?" Keitaro said to himself as he went back in the spring, a bit calmer; then he laughed. "Who am I kidding, if I didn't speak up, I would probably be heading headfirst into another highway by now. Its about time that she got what she deserved, that stupid jerk."

(O)

            _That stupid jerk!_ Naru thought angrily as she clutched her Liddo-kun.

            "Naru Sempai, are you okay?" Motoko asked, trying to comfort her friend. Naturally, she does her best to hide the fact that Keitaro's outburst emotionally shattered her.

            "O-of course," she says, trying to play it cool as usual. Unfortunately for her, her body didn't feel like playing along. She just started crying spontaneously. Motoko awkwardly gave her a hug so Naru could cry on her shoulder. She did her best to ignore the feeling of their bare chests touching.

            "What's wrong with Keitaro? Why's he so mad at me?" she said between sobs. Motoko searched within her for some kind of answer. She gave the only answer she had.

            "I don't Naru-chan…" she said, suddenly sensing a dark aura enveloping the hot springs. "I just don't know anymore…"

(O)

            Keitaro's mood just got worse as the day went by. It had even gotten to the point where he was starting to become cold to poor Shinobu, whose only fault was that she wanted to try and break the spell that Keitaro had become stricken with. And she had it the easiest. Whenever a tenant so much as approached him, he stared daggers at them. With Naru in particular, his eyes burned with the fires from the pits of hell, as if saying 'Go to hell. I don't want to be disgraced by your presence ever again!'

            Which was particularly hard on her, since she tried her best to apologize for what happened earlier that day. Motoko felt very uneasy whenever she was near Keitaro, since she sensed a very dark aura enveloping Keitaro, an aura that seemed to be getting darker with each passing moment.

            Dinner was pretty bad, but not as bad as it could have been, since Keitaro opted to study in his room alone. Just digressing a bit, Keitaro had all but abandoned the study group he had form with Naru and Mutsumi. Getting back to the subject, Shinobu went to his room to give him his dinner, but he flatly refused. Shinobu, being the innocent, kind hearted person she was, apologized for angering him and cooking unsuitably and ran off crying. Keitaro made no move to follow her and just moved to close the door. Motoko had seen this and scolded him for making her cry, and Keitaro almost went ballistic on her. Almost.

            With his face showing the rage that he could barely contain, he said to her coldly, "I'm sorry Motoko, I just don't have time for this. I have to get back to my studies," and simply closed his door.

            Everyone seemed to think that it couldn't get any worse that day, but boy were they in for a surprise!

(-O-)

            And I'll end it here so you guys don't get too accustomed to long chapters. Sorry in advance for the next chapter not being that long…I think.

            I hope to have chapter 3 and possibly 4 up by tommorrow, but I don't think ill get much done until classes are over for this week. I hope you have enjoyed this story so far.

Good or bad, please review, though I truly hope I can get some constructive advice on my english, since this is my only real way to practice. =P


	3. Mind Games

**Book One: The Straw That Broke The Pervert's Back**

**Chapter Three:** Mind Games

**By:** Sci-Fi Raptor

**Disclaimer: **_See Chapter One_

This one is pretty dark…

(-O-)

            Big Brother knows all... Well, in this case, it was Big Sister. The atmosphere in the house was annoying Kitsune. She wasn't used to everyone being to tense and on-edge. She also thought she would never see the day when Keitaro would become so… cold. She, like everyone else in the house loved their landlord (not just romantically) and also felt upset when he was. True, they didn't act it, but it still didn't mean they hated him.

            So she got thinking, and we know what happens when she starts conniving. The plan was simple: scanty clothing, a little alcohol here or there, a nose bleeding Keitaro and if she were lucky, some extra money for some more Sake. The usual.

            She went to her room to prepare. She completely undressed, except for an oversized shirt and panties. Mind you that it was also a thin shirt, letting one see any curve or um… protrudances on her body. She took a small sip of sake to give the air that she was drunk and set off to work.

            Taking a deep breath, she opened Keitaro's door and 'stumbled' in, closing the door behind her. As if not noticing she was in Keitaro's room, she made her way to Keitaro's futon, where she lay down, as if to sleep.

            "Kitsune, can you please leave?" Keitaro said in a formal fashion. "I'm trying to study."

            "What are you talking about?" Kitsune said as if drunk. "This is my room. But if you wanted to 'study' with me, all you had to do was ask," she said, sensually making her way to Keitaro's side. This didn't unfetter Keitaro.

            Not one to just give up, Kitsune went up a notch. She subtly hunched forward so a lot of her chest could be seen and rubbed it on Keitaro's arm. That got a response.

            Blushing, Keitaro acted as he normally would. _Now I'm getting somewhere._

            "Kitsune, you're drunk. Why don't I take you back to your room," he said with to tone of a concerned friend.

            "But we're already in my room, silly," she said, her left hand landing on his inner thigh and slowly advancing up. "Besides… I want to make love to you…" se said, licking her lips for affect.

            And that's where everything went wrong.

            Normally, Keitaro would have done something like, nose bleed, run around frantically and give in to Kitsune's demands after she hinted to his wallet. But what happened next was far from that.

             "Do you now?" Keitaro said, with an icy edge to his voice. Her hand was on his crotch playfully up to this point, but she quickly retracted it when she realized something was wrong. But he grabbed her wrist before she could move it away from him. "I think I want to make love to you too…" he said, a dangerous glint in his eye.

            He pushed her down so that he was on top of her and forced his way between her legs. He pinned her other hand down to the floor and assaulted her breasts, which were already all but hanging out.

             "Keitaro…" Kitsune gasped at the unthinkable, frozen in terror. Who would have thought that the tables would ever turn… or that Kitsune would ever be raped?

            At the sound of his name, Keitaro seemed to be turned on, as was evident from the sudden warmth Kitsune felt from his crotch. He let one of her hands go and slowly went up her shirt as it neared her panties.

            Kitsune finally gained control of her body and struggled, but the sheer power of an active red-blooded male was too much for her. As he almost finished doing what he set out to do, Kitsune whimpered, "please stop…" with as much willpower as she could, since she thought that it was already over. "STOP!" she shrieked, the last of it gone. What happened next took her by surprise.

            He let go.

            He got off of her, stood up and helped her to her feet. He then fixed her shirt, which was completely disoriented and brushed aside a few hairs clinging to her face. He also wiped away a few tears.

            As if nothing just happened, Keitaro said, "Good night," and escorted her to the door. He closed it, and went back to his studies.

            _Now she knows how it feels to be on the receiving end of her mind games._ Keitaro thought happily as he went back to his math book. _I like how this feels, having it my way. I can't believe I've let these- girls push me around for so long. Things are looking up…_

            For some reason, Keitaro scored a near perfect on that practice test.

(O)

            Kitsune just stood there, mentally shivering at what had just happened. _Keitaro almost raped me. KEITARO almost RAPED me,_ her thoughts kept repeating. Unknowns to her, she was tearing, her arms wrapped around her body in an effort to comfort herself.

            For some reason, Motoko 'happens' to walk by Keitaro's room (cough spying cough) and notices Kitsune standing in front of Keitaro's door, as if she were a deer staring death in the eye, in the form of a speeding truck that is.

            "Kitunse-chan," Motoko asks worriedly, sensing her troubled aura. "Is something wrong?" The eyes that meet hers almost make her step back.

            "Motoko…" Kitsune says, her tears flooding now. "I think I crossed the line…"

(O)

            Naru slowly inched the latch between her and Keitaro's room up to see how he was doing. She had been constantly thinking about him, well, thinking about him more than usual, since the incident at the hot springs. Without him noticing, Naru scanned his room and saw that it wasn't any different then normal. He was actually studying, and from what she could see from his textbooks surprised her; he did pretty well on the last practice test he took. Sighing, she closed the latch quietly to go back to her thoughts.

            _What's going on with you, Keitaro?_

(-O-)

blush I cant believe I wrote what I wrote… good thing its not that great, cus other wise, id be worried about myself…

I hope you all enjoyed this chapter… I think. I hope the next chapter will let me make amends!

Good or bad, please review, though I truly hope I can get some constructive advice on my english, since this is my only real way to practice. =P


	4. On Being ‘Normal’

**Book One: The Straw That Broke The Pervert's Back**

**Chapter Four:** On Being 'Normal'

**By:** Sci-Fi Raptor

**Disclaimer: **_See Chapter One_

I couldn't find a good, obvious title for this chapter… sorry. (Ive notice that im apologizing so much this chapter… I must have taken on the mindset of the grls, lol)

I've been put into a dilemma due to the unusal level of feedback that this fic has gotten and due to my inexperience with it. So I will let you guys figure it out for me (my comp sci teacher says the best programmers are the lazy ones =P)

Though I plan on going through with my original story line, I will let you, the readers decide if I should make a sub-story in which Keitaro does not recover from this dark mindset. I know we will probably have a lot of fun with it, but I don't really think I can fight my concious like this if I don't have anyone's support for it. So here are two polls that I will ask people to vote on:

1. Should I make a sub/alternate story in which Keitaro does _not_ recover from this dark state of mind, and

2. If I do make this sub-story (or possibly in my original story), should I make Keitaro fall for another girl in or out the house (like Kanako, or a cross over)? For this one I request that you give reasoning, since otherwise I really wont have something to base the relationship on.

(not a poll, but id appreaciate if you respond to this too) 3. I really liked that some people are commenting on what they like to see, and it helps me with writers bloack, so if anyone has an good ideas, plz email it to me (so its stays a surpurise). Don't worry, youll get your due credit.

            For those of you fluffy types, don't worry about the original story, since it wasn't my intention to make a dark fic when I created it. But this 'feedback' thing is new to me, so there is a possibility that black evilness may burn the fluff if I have overwhelming response for it. Indeed, my mind has already been cooking up ideas for the alternate version… I hear marijuana is a very entertaining narcotic…

Oh yeah, turns out this fic loaded fine. My computer just seems to have weirds thing going on with its fonts, so I'm seeing all of these ?'s. I hate you ppl… made me worry for nothing!!! For that, I will make another short chapter and not update till the end of this week!

Im sorry if quality drastically deteriorated on this chapter (didn't goe through my 3 sets of proof reading…); I wasn up till like 4 writing it (I'm gonna pass out in class tommorrow…), for you, my gracious readers! Enjoy!

(-O-)

            It was another normal day outside. The birds were chirping. Flowers blooming. No strange noises coming out of Hinata-Sou. Its neighbors were happily surprised how quiet it had been lately. Yes, for once it was a _normal_ day.

(O)

            She didn't know why, but she finally decided to get out of bed. She didn't know how, but she somehow got the initiative to get ready for yet another day. But she didn't want to get up. She didn't want to face yet another day. Not with the way things had been going lately. She slammed back onto her futon.

            Naru gave a sigh of defeat as her sleepiness completely dissolved, leaving her lying on her bed, bored as heaven. She slowly got up, rubbed the sleep from her eyes and did her daily morning routine. In around half an hour, she made her way downstairs to the dining room, where, surprisingly, everyone was eating. Everyone except a certain pervert. Someone must have noticed her staring longingly at his empty seat, since that someone said to her, "Sempai's gone to the clinic to finally get his cast removed." She turned to see who the speaker was and saw Shinobu looking at her with a face that was possibly more depressed than her own.

            "What are you telling me for?" she replied automatically. "Its not like I care," she said in a tone that even she knew was fake. She sighed and took her seat.

            It seemed that the Hinata-Sou's atmosphere of happiness had completely disappeared to an air of depression and tension. It was best expressed in Shinobu's cooking: just a normal omelet and almost burned toast. Also, Su wasn't running around, though Sarah still had a sharp tongue. Musumi was nowhere in sight. Naru sighed again. Whether she wanted to admit it or not, Keitaro was a very important part of the house, and however he felt would ultimately spread to the others. Which would explain why the atmosphere was so happy and lively normally, since Keitaro was never really sad or angry, but that was then, and this is now.

            Naru slammed her fist into the table, making a dent with splinters sticking out. Her sudden vent of anger caught everyone's attention. She stared back at all of the ghastly faces, which looked at her as if she was about to offer a glimmer of hope.

            And she suddenly had it.

            "Okay, that stupid jerk is pissed off. So what? Its not like he's that important…" she said, fighting a losing argument. The reactions on their faces just served to emphasize that.

            "Alright, alright. Something's wrong with Keitaro and we have to figure out how to make him feel better…" Naru said, her head looking down in defeat.

            As if some strange supernatural being had popped in and filled all of them up with "juice," they all slowly came back to life in anticipation of bringing their precious landlord back to his normal self.

            "So, what are we going to do, Naru-sempai?" Shinobu asked weakly. Of all of the tenants, she just may have taken Keitaro's sudden change in disposition the hardest.

            "Well, first we have to think about what's gone wrong with that idiot," Naru said, life coming back to her. She hadn't had this much energy since the last time she punched that little worm clear across the city. "Does anyone have any ideas?" Everyone stood in guilty silence, knowing that they had all contributed something to his "condition." (Except for Sarah, since she just hated his guts… she just continued poking Su with a stick, though she was suddenly getting her energy back at the thought of being able to make an invention to help the cause.)

            Motoko was the first to speak. She pretended to clear her throat in an attempt to gain her comrade's attention.

            She started speaking, her eyes closed as if in meditation, "Lately I have noticed that there has been a dark aura surrounding Urishima." Everyone (except Sarah) gasped in surprise, and a little in relief. Maybe it wasn't their faults that he had suddenly snapped. "And I fear that with each passing second, it has grown darker and darker. I did my best to seek out any demons that may have been influencing him, but my investigation has determined that this is how Urishima truly feels inside about us." Everyone sat in silence (except Sarah…), his or her worst fears confirmed. They took comfort in the fact that it was a combined effect and no one person was to blame, but it didn't make them feel less guilty.

            "I don't know why, but Sempai is just really cold and distant for some reason…" Shinobu added, spelling out what everyone already knew. Kitsune stirred, getting everyone's attention.

            "And I think that maybe we've been crossing the line…" Kitsune said quietly, here normal foxy air all but missing.

            "W-what do you mean, Kitsune-chan?" Naru asked, not liking the way it was heading. Most likely she would put all of the blame on her for sending that retard into the atmosphere; even if it were true. But what happened next upset her more than being accused of being responsibly for this whole debacle could have.

            Kitsune started tearing.

            Everyone held a pained expression when they saw her try to recompose herself, but she just cried more and harder. Motoko stood up and came next to her to try and comfort her. It took a few minutes before Kitsune could even think of talking, but she finally forced herself to confess.

            "Yesterday night…" she started, grimacing as the memory came flooding back. But she wouldn't give up; this had to be said. "Y-yesterday night. I went into Keitaro's room. I swear, it was just to cheer him up! I swear… A-anyway, I went into his room to cheer him up. So maybe I got a little too carried away, I didn't think the Sake would be that much of a problem. But I was kinda hitting on him, you know like I usually do. And then I kinda asked him if he wanted to make love to me, you know as a joke, right? Well anyway… that's when Kei…k-k…keitaro…" she said, almost unable to finish. Fortunately for her, Motoko held her hand in support and she didn't break down too much. She finally recomposed herself and did her best to finish the final stretch. Taking a deep breath, she continued, "That was when Keitaro almost raped me."

            Those who had their heads supported with their arms suddenly had it drop. Those whose heads were up on their own accord had their jaws drop to the table. There was only one thing going through all of their minds: _KEITARO almost RAPED Kitsune._ No one wanted to believe it. No one thought such a thing was possible. Was this the same kind and sweet Keitaro that they had grown to love over the last two years? Shinobu was already crying, "No! Sempai wouldn't do such a thing!"

            The room was filled with uproar as everyone treated Kitsune as if she were doing this to get Keitaro in trouble. Fortunately for her, Motoko stood up for her and shushed everyone to let her finish her story.

            "Well, he almost raped me, but he didn't," Kitsune quickly said, getting a sigh of relief from everyone. She continued, "He stopped when I told him to, but that wasn't what scared me. It was his eyes…" she said, causing everyone to be on the edge of their seats. "I've never seen such cold hateful eyes in (sob) my life…" she said, her sentence ending in a high-pitched squeal. She buried her face into her arms and just cried. Everyone sat in stunned silence from what they had just heard. And they had only one collective thought: Keitaro hated them.

            Eventually, everyone turned to Naru, since she seemed to be the unofficial leader, for their next move, since no one else was willing to add anything else. Closing her eyes in thought, Naru came to a decision.

            "All right, everyone," she said, punching on hand into the palm of the other in an attempt to rouse everyone up. "From what we've heard, Keitaro's probably really mad at us right now, so we have to come up with a really good plan to make him happy again." Everyone waited for what her idea was. "So, I've decided that, we will meet at the hot springs to continue this conversation," she finished. They all had skeptical looks; what could a change of scenery do? Everything about Hinata-Sou reminded them of Keitaro.

            "Come on guys, this House is just too depressing." Everyone nodded in assent. "At least we can lighten the mood at the springs and think straight. So, what do you say!" she said, filled with a drive that she hadn't felt for what felt like ages.

            "Yeah…" the group said, almost in the spirit.

(O)

            Seven hours later, the girls left the hot springs, red as chilies and pruny as their seniors.

            But Naru turn out right in the end; the hot spring's magic did its work. During the whole session, the ladies got their energy back, more or less back to normal.

            They all said what they couldn't at the dining table and slowly loosened up. After getting all of their guilt off of their (sizable) chests, they girls quickly formulated a plan. And after their master plan was designed, one would never have guesses that this batch of lively girls was remotely related to the girls earlier that morning.

            They spent the latter portion of their bath just soaking in, or in Shinobu, Sarah and Su's case, having the time of their lives.

            Naru smiled as she left the baths, happy that everyone was happy again. _Just you wait Keitaro, _she thought. _We'll have you back to your cheerful self in no time!_

            "Hahahaa!" Su laughed as she came from behind Naru. "Your butt is as red as a chili and pruny an elephants!" she teased Naru, flashing her rump to the two other young girls. Shinobu blushed and Sarah started laughing like an idiot, rolling on the floor.

            "Su!" Naru yelled, chasing after her. She didn't have much luck though; Su was off the running around and off the walls with her familiar hyperness.

            Yes, it was a normal day; the Hinata-Sou was back! (Much to the displeasure of its neighbors…   )

(-O-)

I apologize for my other half's earlier comment. In truth, this chapter isn't up to my implied par (its about 87.5% of one of my standard chapter sizes…) because this is my last chance to update b4 classes start this week and I just wanted that poll up so as many ppl as possible could see it b4 I started writing the next chapter. (Though ill see how everyone responds, I probably wont have any time to write, that's all)

I really would like to respond to all the gracious reveiws that I've received so far, but I really didn't have time during the writing of this chapter or the brain capacity to process the large number (at least for me…) of responses I have received.

            Well, actually, there is one thing I want to respond to, and that is to what MinToshihiro said. Thought it is true english isnt my first language, the reason I evenmentioned it is cause im really a math/science person, and I just have always sucked at enlgish and have been using these fics as a tool to fine tune and keep up my english skills. I don't mean to offend you or anything, I just wanted to clear up any misunderstandings. (if you read my other fics, I think ull notice)

Yeah, if any of what ive said is repetitive, I apologize, since this is like the upteenth time I edited that chapter during the course of this day, and its like 3 AM…

Again, my sincerest apologies…

Good or bad, please review, though I truly hope I can get some constructive advice on my english, since this is my only real way to practice. =P


	5. Announcement Part I

**Book One: The Straw That Broke The Pervert's Back**

**Chapter Five: **Announcement

**By:** Sci-Fi Raptor

**Disclaimer: **_See Chapter One_

Wow… I was blabbing like an idiot the last chapter. When did I write all of that? I'm usually contained and concise…

Sorry for the lateness, so I apologize by making this a bit longer than the previous ones. (Readers generate curses upon curses to the author for the lame bribe/excuse)

Yeah, for simplicity's sake, lets just say that Mutsumi had a mild faint that forced her to stay overnight at the nearest hospital for observation… (No! I don't have anything against her! I just kinda needed her out of the way for this…)

(-O-)

            The "Plan", as it was called, was fool proof. There was no way it couldn't work. If it didn't work, though no one wanted to admit it, it would mean that they truly had lost Keitaro forever…

            The hardest part was making Keitaro fall for their trap. They had joined heads and developed multiple strategies to get Keitaro where he needed to be. Shinobu would be the first to attack.  

            Even though Shinobu was very resistant to the idea, the girls had convinced her that it had to be done; she would have to lie to her Sempai. When he would come home, she would tell him that someone needed to see him in the guest room. But in all reality, that was where their trap was. They would have put it in his room from the beginning, and avoid a whole lot of unnecessary headache, but his room was just too messy at the moment. For some reason, it looked like a hurricane had dropped by for a few minutes in there…

            But in the event that Keitaro didn't listen to or believe her, Mitsune would be up next. She would complain about something being broken nearby the guestroom, and when he would go near it, she would shove him in.

            But everyone knew that Kitsune probably wouldn't feel up to par around Keitaro at the moment, so Naru would be her back up. Even if Keitaro was PMSing, he was still a man, and men were always fallible to the charms of women; especially women that they had been lusting for for two years.

            But if all else failed, they would resort to excessive force. Even if Keitaro was invincible, a Naru punch or Motoko's Ki attacks could still send him flying through the walls and into the target room.

            Of course, during the duration of this phase, Su would have her 'mellow ray' gun firing off at Keitaro to soften him up to everyone's assaults.

            Once phase one was complete (which also included tying Keitaro up so he couldn't escape), the all-important phase two would commence. After being securely strapped into Su's "Virtual-kun," (which would automatically grab him if it sensed him and strap him to the chair) everyone would project all of their good feelings and thoughts to him and remind him of all the good and cherished memories they had made together. This would be an automated process that would last a few seconds, since the girls would have already preloaded those memories in the Virtual-kun's memory. (Su didn't mention this to anyone at the time, but the "Virtual-kun" would play back whatever he was seeing through its output screen, so everyone would see glimpses of what everyone had stored).

            Since the girls thought that what they were going to tell/show/project to Keitaro would remain secure and secret (much to their disappointment…), they had included deep dark secrets and said things they normally would never have the nerve to speak of. For example, Motoko had inadvertently included some of her R rated dreams. Naru and Shinobu had professed their love and Kitsune admitted that some of the times when she hit on him were heartfelt.

            They had poured their hearts and souls into the Virtual-kun in a last ditch effort to make their precious landlord understand that everything they had been doing was just a front for what they felt for him but couldn't say.

            And it was up to Keitaro at that point; it was his choice if he wanted to throw away everything that everyone had done with him through the years, or give them a second chance.

            "Su," Naru asked the evil little mad scientist, "how's the Virtual-kun looking?"

            "I'm done with the capturing device, chair and the input, but the memories are giving me a little trouble."

            "What kind of trouble?" Naru said in fear, hoping that it wouldn't ruin the "Plan."

            "Well, its not that there's any problem with putting them in, its just that I'm kinda out of space. Motoko-chan put so many memories that I had to dedicate a whole sector for her, while everyone else just made too many vivid memories for me to store."

            "Is that going to be a problem?" she asked in a worried tone.

            "Nah, ill just to steal a mainframe," she said happily and ran out of the room, hanging a sign that said "Back in five minutes."

            Naru just hung her head down and left, knowing that she couldn't stop Su once she got started. She made a stop to see how everyone else was doing and saw that they were all missing. She searched the whole house and found them in Su's jungle/lab/room.

            "What are all of you doing here?" Naru asked them when she managed to squirm her way through the trees and vines.

            "We had nothing to do, so we got bored and decided to put in some more memories into the Virtual-kun." Kitsune answered.

            "But Su just told me that she didn't have enough space for the memories we already put!" she exclaimed.

            "Oh, about that sempai, Su explained to us…" Shinobu said.

            Kitsune cut in, "The Virtual-kun originally used a 3.5 inch floppy for its memory. Once she gets a mainframe, we wont have enough time to fill it up with our memories."

            "Oh," Naru mused. "Can I go next?" she asked.

            "Sure," Kitsune said with a foxy grin on her face. Naru could tell something was up, since she was immediately given the mind reader. _Oh well, it cant be that bad. Now, what should I start off with?_

            "I can't believe you did that to Naru-sempai, Kitsune-chan," Shinobu teared.

            "Hey, I didn't see you telling her," she retorted.

            "Aaauuuu…" she cried, backed into a wall.

            "It'll be interesting seeing what she records if she thinks that we can't see what she's thinking," Kitsune said with a toothy grin. Everyone hushed up as Naru's thoughts were projected on screen.

            "Keitaro…" Naru's inner self started. They were taken aback by how much more beautiful she looked for him and the expression on her face; it was full of so much love.

(O)

Many minutes later:

            Naru took the Virtual-kun's input device off feeling refreshed, like a great weight had been taken off of her. She did feel a bit tired though, since she had finally leveled with Keitaro and finally made sense of her emotions. And unknown to her, she had set herself up so that if Keitaro did reject them in the end, she would feel the pain that she had been trying to avoid since she was a kid.

            "What's wrong everyone?" she asked when she saw the looks they were all giving her; it ranged from highly moved to very amused.

            "I didn't know!" Shinobu burst out and ran away with a trail of tears.

            "I didn't know it was like that," Kitsune said with a foxy grin.

            "Sempai… I don't know what to say…" Motoko said uncomfortably.

            "What are you guys talking about?" Naru said, even more confused. Not getting an answer, she looked around she room and noticed a large LCD monitor. What was on it was the last thing she thought of while in the Virtual-kun.

            "You guys…" she said simmering. Those still in the room made small steps toward the entrance.

            "Now Naru," Kitsune said nervously. "Remember, you have to control your temper. Remember, that's partially the reason we're in this mess.

            Now, normally Naru would stop and realize that Kitsune is right. Even if she were as mad as a dog in heat, she would still be able to register that. But they had invaded her most secret thoughts and she would exact her revenge.

            She put her trembling fist down and looked at the three with evil eyes (causing Motoko to unconsciously start reciting stuff). "You're right, Kitsune. I shouldn't let my anger get the best of me again," Naru conceded.

            Everyone made a sigh of relief.

            "_BUT_, I can't let you guys get away with this," she said evilly. She had positioned her self so that she was in the way of the door and the girl had nowhere to go. "_SO_, I will just take these!" she said and snatched the memory stick from each girl so quickly, not even Motoko noticed.

            "W-w-wait! Naru-Sempai, be reasonable!" Motoko begged.

            "I think not sending you all on a one way trip to Kyoto is reasonable enough," she said evilly and snatched a portable Virtual-kun. She put it on and played the memories on the stick.

            "NO!" the two girls said as they made to tear it off of her.

            "Oh my gosh, Motoko!" Naru exclaimed, causing Motoko to panic. Naru was on the run and the two tried to keep up. They were going from one end of the house to the other, turning the whole place upside down. It looked like a war zone; you know, like when Su's done playing with Keitaro.

            Some time later, Naru had given up and taken the portable Virtual-kun off. Motoko and Kitsune had stopped behind her and were huffing and puffing. _How can a ronin, who spent her whole life studying, run so fast and for so long?_ Motoko thought.

            Naru looked at the two with a look that clearly said: I know something about you, so I own you! The grin on her face was going from ear to ear, though she too was huffing and puffing and wet from all of her sweat.

            "That was some… interesting stuff," Naru said cruelly.

            The two stood there with their faces going as red as a cherry.

            "I can explain!" Motoko started.

            "Nah, I was kidding," Naru cut her off, showing that their memory sticks where in her pocket and not in the Virtual-kun. "It's a dud," she added, turning the helmet and showing a sticker that said "Model."

            "You should have seen the looks on your faces, though," she said, pointing and laughing. "It was so precious… But I wonder what could be in it that embarrasses you two so much?" Naru mused.

            "Gack" the two said in unison. They had been had.

            "Maybe I should check it out!" Naru said, dashing off to Su's room and locking the door behind her.

            Needless to say, Motoko and Kitsune weren't having a happy day. Kitsune, in particular, cursed herself for not realizing how evil Naru could be…

(O)

Some Time Later:

            As Naru waited near the entrance in her designated spot, she had only one thought in mind: _We'll have you back to normal, Keitaro. And there isn't _anything_ that will stop me from getting you back!_ Out of habit, she blushed and thought, _Not that I care or anything…_ In after thought she thought _I'm still doing that…_ and smacked herself in the face.

            The other girls had almost the same resolve as she. They anxiously waited in their designated places for the entrance to open and reveal their beloved landlord. Su and Sarah were stationed in a pill-mine like getup, manning the "mellow ray" gun.

            It was too bad, however, that that resolve only applied during daylight hours and up to three o'clock at night.

Keitaro never showed up. He didn't even bother giving a phone call; as if he knew exactly what they were doing, stripping them of their only way to repent for their atrocities (except Shinobu, though she always had low self-esteem when it came to her Sempai). Merely at 3 AM, the youngest four had already fallen asleep and Naru and Kitsune weren't far behind.

            The last conscious thought Naru remembered having was: _Did you plan this, Keitaro? Do you really hate us this much?_

(O)

            When Naru woke up, the birds weren't chirping. From the way the sun was shining in her eye, she could tell that it was sometime in the afternoon. And from way the loud ringing noise that woke her up wouldn't get any quieter, she felt like dishing out one of her Naru punches.

            "Doesn't anyone know that some people are trying to sleep here!" she yelled angrily. Getting no response, she got up grumpily and went to wash her face. She grimaced when she saw the aftermath of her little incident with Motoko and Kitsune; the House was wasted. As she passed by the living room, she noticed it was three in the afternoon.

            _Three in the afternoon!_ Naru thought alarmingly. She quickly searched the house for her comrades to wake them up. _Keitaro might just have found out about our Plan, even if he didn't know what was going on yesterday!_ she thought in alarm. She found Su, Sarah and Shinobu in a pile in the pill-mine. She tried waking up Su, but it was hopeless. Sarah almost bit her and Shinobu was under the pile.

            "Damn," she cursed. "Gotta find Motoko and Kitsune." She ran around the house, looking for them in their hideouts, but they were nowhere to be seen. Suddenly, that ringing noise registered and she followed it, ready to beat whomever it was making it to a pulp. She managed to find herself at the hot springs and was surprised to see that Motoko and Kitsune were already there; they both had looks of disbelief as they stared at something.

            "What's going on?" she asked. They just pointed, their arms completely outstretched. She followed their direction and saw something that she probably wouldn't have thought of at a time like this.

            It was Keitaro in nothing but a pair of shorts fixing the area around the springs.

            "Was he the one making all of that noise?" Narusegewa asked redundantly. They nodded in confirmation. "How long has he been up to this?"

            "Apparently, Urishima has been fixing all of the Hinata-Sou since four this morning," Motoko said, finding it hard not to watch as Keitaro's sweaty back muscles rippled.

            "So, I'm guessing that you guys did the "Plan" without me…" Naru said, a bit disappointed. She wanted to be the first one to welcome the old Keitaro back.

            "No," Motoko said, taking her by surprise. "He's been doing this of his own accord."

            "Maybe he's fixing up the place so that he can make it an inn again," she said, I bit of hope in her voice. But some pessimistic part of her added, "and then kick us out…" Kitsune finished, sounding as if all were lost.

            "I guess its over…" Motoko agreed, a tired expression on her face.

            For some reason, Naru couldn't bear to bother Keitaro from his work. It may have been the air of happiness and purpose that stopped her. She hadn't seen him like this for far too long. She decided then, that for _once_, she would put someone else's happiness before hers, even if it hurt her to do so. _Just like how Keitaro acted these last few years…_

            Eventually, Shinobu and Mutsumi (who was released from the hospital after the doctor was satisfied of her health, though still baffled) joined in the staring contest. Su and Sarah kept on sleeping.

            Suddenly, Keitaro lost his footing and fell, grabbing a gutter at the last second. He waved his legs and one arm wildly as the other held on, but he still fell to the floor. Naru and Shinobu rushed up to aid him in an instant, while everyone else sweat dropped. He didn't look at the two tough; he was too busy rubbing his butt, which took most of the impact from the fall. The girls suddenly wished they hadn't listened to their impulse. When Keitaro would look their way, they knew would be met with very cold eyes. That was if he even acknowledged their existence anymore. What Kitsune said about Hinata-Sou being an inn again sounded more like a fact then a rumination.

            One thing about the recent Keitaro didn't change: he failed to stop surprising them. When he turned to notice the two anxiously waiting behind him, he didn't give them a look that would freeze lava.

            It was far from it. It was the same caring eyes that they had become accustomed to for so long.

            "Keitaro…" Naru whispered. Keitaro turned red when he realized that he was standing almost naked in front of two people of the opposite gender. The two girls quickly turned away when they also realized this, blushing. He hauled _ass_ out of there, going so fast that there was an after image staring at the two for a few seconds.

            "Wait… now I'm confused…" Shinobu said taking a look, her eyes spiraling. Within a blink of an eye, Keitaro occupied the space that his afterimage held onto for him in his normal working clothes.

            "Keitaro?" Naru said, also confused.

            "I have an announcement to make," he said to everyone, completely ignoring Naru. Naru couldn't help but put her hand to her chest as a sudden pain filled her heart.

(-O-)

Quick note: the reason why the sections weren't sectioned off before is because the tilda character I use to section off chapters (that little wavy thing that is on the immediate left of the "1" key) for some reason is discarded by whatever has processing the chapters. So I've replaced it from all of the other chapters and hopefully everyone can see the new ones.

I bet a lot of people are wondering what is going on with Keitaro (readers in the process of lynching author for making such a sudden change), but I'm afraid I won't even hint at what is truly going on with him till the end of this book.

The polls speak for themselves. For my original story, I project one or two more chapters until I start the second book, which will be 3-5 chapters and then the final book that is basically open from then on.

For the sub story, I'm going to create a new story with the first 3 or four chapters (I'm not sure where to start yet) of this one and then treat it like it's a separate story.

Hanku: Thankyou very much!

Tornado(Reviewer: I will show more badass Keitaro, but I won't tell where (and I don't mean in my dark fic, since it is a separate entity from this one past chapter 4)

Jennyjennai: wait for book two for the explanation about Keitaro

Jerails: about my English, I am trying to improve my formal English, and am trying my best to emulate a novel, if that makes it any clearer

Zero-Vision: I'm treating Mutsumi more as a device than a character, so don't worry. (Now that I think of it, I think I've been using Shinobu as a device too, so that might explain why I've been harassing her to get certain things moving)

Demon King Piccolo: I think ur right about my 2nd poll. But I already have the story made up in my head; it's just a matter of typing and posting it now (though I tend to procrastinate with updating when classes are around)

One Azn Dragon: Sorry about Shinobu, but its kinda in her character…

The Vampire Story Hunter: demons… motoko… too hard to resist. Maybe in another story though

mystikd109: I kinda like the stories with k/shinobu. Not that id write one, but I like the ones that are out on 

Everyone: I would like to thank each and every one of you for reading my story so far and hope you continue to do so till its closing.


	6. Announcement Part II

**Book One: The Straw That Broke The Pervert's Back**

**Chapter Six:** Announcement Part II

**By:** Sci-Fi Raptor

**Disclaimer: **_See Chapter One_

(-O-)

"Promise?" the little girl said in wonder. She looked up at the older boy with a beaming smile. "You... promise?"

The boy nodded with a bigger smile and let go of her pinky. The little girl's small, timid grin grew to a wholehearted smile as her heart lit up at the thought of what the older boy said.

"When we grow up, let's meet up again at Todai, no matter what..." the boy said, smiling back. This caused the little girl to giggle with delight and run up to the boy to give him a big bear hug.

"Not so tight!" the boy protested. The girl's embrace completely loosened and she stood quiet. The two stood there for quiet a while until the boy said, "Hey..."

The girl stood as still as a mountain.

"Hey?" he said and moved her a little back. To his horror, she started crumpling to the ground, a glazed expression on her face. "Hey! What's wrong!" the boy said, bolting down to catch her before she injured her head. She still had that dead look on her face.

"No..." the boy said in horror. "This can't be happening. They fixed that problem! Why is it still happening!" the little boy cried, sobbing into her chest. By now, all the adults had noticed the commotion and were running to see what happened. Through his sobbing, he could hear a faint noise escaping the girl's lips. He slowly moved towards her face and put his ear next to her mouth so he could hear what she was saying.

"...promise. We promised we would meet... again.... at Todai...." With that, her eyes closed as she seemingly went to another world.

"NO!!!" the boy screamed. The sky suddenly started to rain, as if all of nature were weeping with him.

(O)

Keitaro had told all of the tenants to meet him outside Hinata-Sou's entrance (the area where the steps lead to) for an important message and quickly left. The tenants whispered among themselves what this could mean. Within minutes everyone (including Sarah, Su and Mutsumi) gathered at the appointed meeting place and waited for Keitaro to speak. After collecting his thoughts, Keitaro opened his mouth to speak.

_Here it comes…_ Kitsune thought dreadfully.

_It has been an honor to know all of you…_ Motoko vowed.

_Why Sempai?_ Shinobu thought on the verge of crying.

_Ara Ara…_ a certain ditz thought.

_Banana…_ (This stream of thought is not even worth noting, due to its extreme single-mindedness)

"About yesterday, I'm sorry that I didn't call to say that I'd come home so late, and I'm really sorry if I worried all of you." Everyone stood in shock. This definitely wasn't what they were expecting.

"But something happened yesterday and it made me think. It made me think about how precious each and everyone one of you are to me and how much joy being with each of you has brought me." They stood in stunned silence. What was he getting at?

"I know I've acted badly over the past few days… I said things that I really wish I hadn't. I'm sorry for having spoken so out of line to both of you, Naru and Motoko. I shouldn't have exploded like that. I'm sorry for treating you so coldly, Shinobu. I know that all you wanted was for me to get better.

"I've done things that I wish I could take back (He looked at Kitsune with an ashamed face). But I _can't_. All I can do is ask for all of you to forgive me." The girls stood silently, on the verge of tears.

_Keitaro's normal again!_

While thoughts of pure happiness went thought their minds, they didn't hear what he was saying until he said something that almost chilled their blood: "but actions speak louder then words," he continued, his nervousness of what he was about to say screaming through his face by the look of apprehension on it. "So… I have fixed the Hinata-sou and will exempt this month's rent in hopes that you all will forgive me." He went to the floor on his knees and said something that made everything right: "I'm sorry…"

Unable to hold back any longer, the girls all ran to him to give him a heartwarming hug. Naru, Kitsune, Motoko and Shinobu said that they all forgave him and the group stayed together in the tearful, emotional cluster until Sarah started gagging and tried to force her way out.

(O)

The girls had all forgiven Keitaro by the next day and all was well again. They had also told him that his attempts at reconciliation weren't needed and that they would still pay that month's rent, much to their Kanrinin's relief. For once Kistune didn't even try to skimp out on paying. She liked being challenged, she replied to the girls when they asked her about it.

The entrance exam was only a few days away now and the ronins knew it was crunch time. Naru was going down to Keitaro's room to call him to study, but when she poked her head down the hole that connected their rooms, she caught him in the middle of changing.

"Ah!" Keitaro yelped, feeling the embarrassment that Naru felt every time he stumbled into her room without asking.

"Sorry!" Naru yelped back and went back to her room. "Just wanted to tell you that me and Mutsumi are ready to study!" she said, the embarrassment still in her voice. "No Mutsumi! Don't look down there!" she added just as Keitaro put his pants on.

"Ara, ara," she said with a tint of disappointment in her voice. "I don't see what's wrong in here…" she said in her way.

"I was changing!" Keitaro said in anime-style agitation.

"Oh…" Mutsumi said. "Well, are you ready to study then?" she asked.

"Actually, I was going to go study with a friend…" Keitaro said, his face blushing.

"What?" Naru said in disbelief. "Now's not the time to goof around Keitaro! The test is only a few days away!"

"I'm serious about it!" Keitaro said with a hurt expression. "Besides, I promised and I won't go against my word," he said in a final manner. He moved to collect his study materials.

"Fine! Leave! Fail for all I care!" she said angrily and slammed the plywood over the hole adjoining the two rooms.

"I won't fail…" he said to himself quietly and left his room.

Kitsune groaned from where she sat on the sofa while watching TV, "Those two are already at it again…"

"Don't worry, Mitsune-sempai," Shinobu said from the floor where she was doing homework. "It just shows that they're back to normal."

(O)

(Morning of the test)

Keitaro went back and forth between Hinata-sou and his friend's house to study those last few days leading up to the test. It frustrated Naru that he was goofing around right on the home stretch, but she had to admit that at least he didn't seem as nervous about the test this time. He held a confident air, even though he looked haggard every time he came back to the Hinata for one of Shinobu's five-star dinners. And the absence of the male seemed to help the other ronins, since they didn't have any 'incidents' and just spent all of their time studying.

It was finally time for the test and the three had gotten up early for the test. Naru and Keitaro still looked tired, though Mutsumi looked as cheery as ever.

"Good luck, Keitaro-sempai, Naru-sempai, Mutsumi-san," Shinobu said as the two tired looking ronins and the watermelon-loving Mutsumi made their way to the train station.

"Break a leg," Kitsune said with a wily grin. Then she flinched when she realized the 'turtle lady' was among them.

"Good luck!!!" Su said, bouncing around suddenly.

"May the spirits be on your side," Motoko said. The rest of the girls said their own wishes of warm regard and the three started the (suddenly) long climb down.

Mutsumi fainted suddenly and the other two ronins scrambled to keep her from tumbling down.

Everyone sweat dropped and dispersed for their respective activities.

(-O-)

I've finally updated! Yay! I haven't been run over by a car yet for saying those semi-nasty things to a certain someone yet…

Anyways…

I know, I know… I've been a bad little author for not having updated in what was probably 4 months. But I really made an effort to work on it the spare moments of consciousness I had (I was working a 24 hour school week! So many sleepless nights… shudder)

I also know everyone is gonna be mad at me for the extremely short chapter (roughly 1/2 of the previous) but the rest of the stuff would probably work best in the last chapter (Ara ara…) of TSTBTPB. BUT FEAR NOT! For TSTBTPB is just the first book in a three book series I had imagined when I first started this endeavor. (The other reason is because it is what balances this fic's daughter story The Other Me. They both have a Ying Yang relationship that I plan on using down the line in a not too subtle way in one of my greater schemes dealing with fate, supernaturalism, higher dimensions and such.) As I said in the last chapter, the next book (I say book when it's more like a short story. Not even…) will be between 3-5 chapter and the last and final book will be open ended, though I plan on intermingling it with some of my other unfinished works…

Bad news: school opens in a little over a week. Plz don't stone me if I end up not updating again… I have so many classes lined up… (Hey, I like learning about stuff, especially about engines) And I will also do my best to PR for those that I already do it for (though my efficiency will probably drop dramatically).

One last thing: PLZ PLZ PLZ read the daughter fic The Other Me! I spent so much time on it and I'm having so much fun writing it!!! (Not that I'm not having fun writing this!)

And remember, click the 'Go' button. (Flames are understandable, especially if critical)

Cheers! )


	7. The Test

**Book One: The Straw That Broke The Pervert's Back**

**Chapter Seven:** The Test

**By:** Sci-Fi Raptor

**Disclaimer: **_See Chapter One_

Challenge:

Serphina asked me to write a sub-story about what would have happened if the girls would have pulled there plan off and got him into the virtual machine. Can you picture the reaction Keitaro would have after seeing their memories?

Thoughts? I'll leave it to the readers. Time is becoming an expensive commodity now, and I'll think about doing it if people really want it, since I think it's an interesting idea. But I'll warn you, I ain't no good with no fluffs…

I don't know if I'm following the Manga of the Anime/OVA at this point. Its probably a merge between them, but I don't remember which one has Mutsumi trip and remember who Naru is the day of the test.

(-O-)

At the test site, Mutsumi parted ways with the other two of the group, each wishing the other good luck. Naru and Keitaro made their way to their room and sat next to each other. The test started and the two went to work.

Naru scanned the test, like anyone would, and started on her first question. _2A plus 2B equals three and A plus 5B equals 7. What is the solution set?_ Naru thought about the simple question, but she couldn't focus. For some reason, she had gone completely blank. She tried to do the next question in hopes that she'd remember, but everything looked like hieroglyphics. She went into full-blown panic mode. Her vision got blurry as sweat precipitated into her eyes, causing them to burn. The test suddenly became intimidating and she was paralyzed with fear. She felt something on her hand and found that it was Keitaro's own. He was giving her an encouraging smile and his confident air tore down her wall of fear. The two worked confidently to the test's denouement.

(O)

Three hours later, the two stretched. They had submitted their tests and were getting ready to leave.

"So, Naru, how do you think you did?" Keitaro asked.

"I did really well," she said confidently. She remembered how she had deformed in the beginning and blushed. "Thanks for helping me helping me out in the beginning…" she added curtly.

"Heh, don't worry about it," he said, waving a hand dismissively.

"So… how did you do?" she asked.

"I think I did all right. I had a little trouble with the first section, but the rest I covered recently, so they weren't that hard," he said as they left the testing room.

On their way out, they bumped into… a pair of dorks!

"Keitaro!" they shouted, and ran up to him. They wore signs saying 'Good luck next year' and 'Fifth time's the charm.'

"Um… who are you guys again?" Keitaro asked, hand on the back of his head.

"How could you forget us, your best friends!" they said, tears streaking down anime style.

"I think I know you two, but what's your names again?"

"Haitani!" one said, "Shirai!" the other followed, both with anime-style agitation.

"Oh yeah!" Keitaro said.

"Um…" Naru said impatiently. "I'll go meet up with Mutsumi… you have fun in the dork convention," Naru said, causing the two newcomers to go gray in despair.

"Actually, you and Mutsumi should just go on ahead without me. I'll probably take a while," Keitaro said as she left.

"Okay," she answered and left the trio to do whatever perverted stuff they usually did. She walked for a few minutes and found Mutsumi sitting on a bench near her testing room. "Hi, Mutsumi-chan, how'd it go?" she asked.

"I think I did well, how about you?"

"Same here. I had a little trouble in the beginning, but-" she cut herself off when she was about to say something self-incriminating (under Hinata-sou law).

"But what?" the older woman inquired, her head titled to the side questioningly. "Did you start panicing but Kei-kun calmed you down?"

"No!" Naru said automatically, but realized that she had hit the nail on the head. She was about to express her shock, but Mutsumi cut her off.

"I guess my lady's intuition is getting a bit rusty," she said disappointed. "Where is Kei-kun, by the way?"

"He wanted to hang out with his loser friends…" she sighed. She had wanted to hang out with him, if you know what she means.

"Darn," she Mutsumi said, snapping her fingers. "I wanted to say this when both of you were here, but I can't hold it in any longer!"

"What's that?"

"Well, while I was talking to Tama-chan and Liddo-kun, I remembered something from our childhood."

"Really? What did you remember?" Naru asked, not appreciating the scope of what Mutsumi was saying. Te two started walking as Mutsumi explained what really happened when they were kids, and how the promise Keitaro had made was between Keitaro and Naru, not Mutsumi.

Naru stopped walking. Turned to look at her and wasn't sure what kind of expression her face held, though her eye was twitching a bit. Her face held a small timid smile that morphed to a full-fledged grin, and then she started laughing.

"Naru-chan?" Mutsumi asked worriedly, bringing her back to planet earth.

"Hehe… sorry about that Mutsumi," she said with a bright smile on her face. "Let's go."

(O)

As the two finished scaling the steps that led to the Hinata-sou, they found the gang waiting by the entrance. Su held a sign saying, "Better luck next year." Kitsune finally took notice, smack her outside the head and scolded her. Su turned the sign around and it said, "Congratulations on making it in!" but upside-down. When they reached the girls, they all congratulated them for their achievements.

"Um… you guys do know there's another day of testing, right?" Naru said, paying particular attention to Kitsune who most likely coordinated this and was presently staring back at her dumbly. She then reverted back to her slit eyed self and said, "Then well have that party to keep you three motivated!" She opened a bottle of sake that she had been hiding behind her and took a drink.

"Speaking of which, where is that letch?" Motoko asked.

"He's coming a bit later," she explained as everyone filed into a festivly decorated Hinata-sou.

"He's probably hanging back to scope out some prospects…" Kitsune said with insinuating gesticulation.

"I don't care!" Naru replied hotly to the attack, though he body language said otherwise.

The party started off with Kitsune pushing Naru closer and closer to the edge, while everyone else sang karaoke, danced and had a generally fun time.

It was getting late, and Keitaro was getting late. Naru was feeling very anxious, though she did her best to hide it. Unfortunately, the anxiety expressed itself by causing her to become irritable, something that the sake didn't help temper.

The party was finally winding down, since everyone but Naru, and the minors were was drunk. Kitsune had managed to get Motoko to dance with her, something she was very resistant to. Kitsune pulled off some moves on the inexperienced young lady, and tricked her into sharing a passionate kiss. When Motoko realized what she was doing, she pulled back and stood paralyzed, face burning hot.

"What's going in on here?" someone asked. Naru looked to see who the newcomer was and found that it was Keitaro.

"These losers thought that the test lasted for a day," Naru said, walking up to him. "And what took you so long?" she said with a suspicious look. Keitaro suddenly looked like a preteen caught sneaking back home after curfew.

"I was out with friends," he said, his hand on the back of his head.

"Really?" Naru asked, not sounding convinced. He was a horrible liar and she knew something was up.

"Yeah…" Keitaro insisted.

"Whatever," not really caring. He didn't look like he'd been chasing skirt, since he didn't have any slap marks over his face. "We should be going to sleep now anyways. We still have the second half of the test tomorrow."

"Yeah," he agreed and the two went off to go to sleep. Mutsumi had already gone to bed before them, citing something about Liddo-kun.

Naru looked on in wonder as Keitaro scarfed his food. He was eating so fast, he was tied with Su…

"Um… Sempai?" Shinobu asked.

"Yeph?" Keitaro spat, and quickly went back to eating.

"Why are you eating so quickly?"

"Ith cuth yo footh ith vephy philiphouth anth I thithn'th eath thinner lasth nithe," he explained and went back to eating.

"Okay…" she said, not really understanding what he said. Su won by less than a second. She jumped at him and gave him a congratulatory kick in the head, saying, "Better luck next time." Everyone else sweat dropped.

The three ronins set off for the train station, and they only had to catch Mutsumi once!

While they were waiting for the train, Naru nudged Keitaro to the side, so that she could tell him something.

"Yes, Naru?" he questioned when they were out of earshot from Mutsumi.

"I just wanted to tell you…" she said. What Mutsumi had told her played in her mind again, causing her to blush. "I'll wait a year if you don't make it…" she finally said. Then to cover herself, she added, "Since we both promised to get in together and all…"

"Sure Naru," Keitaro said, his hand behind his head, an uncertain look on his face. The train arrived.

(O)

It was finally over! Naru stretched a little bit before she collected her things and left the testing room. Mutsumi was in the room next to hers, so she waited for her to come out. She had been waiting for a few minutes and it seemed that everyone had left the room. She went in to see what was keeping her up and sweat dropped when she found her sprawled over her desk, seemingly asleep, but no doubt fainted. After a few pokes, prods and shakes, Mutsumi woke up, energetic as usual and followed Naru out of the room.

"So, Mutsumi, how did you do?" Naru asked as they headed for the last of their crew's testing room.

"I think I passed, how about you?"

"Same here," Naru answered. They made idle chitchat that most girls do (whatever vile thing that is) and arrived at Keitaro's room. He wasn't waiting outside like they expected him to, so they went into his room too see what was up. They scanned the room and saw a paper on one of the desks. They walked up to it and found Keitaro's bag by the desk's chair, his sticker book sticking out.

"I wonder why Kei-kun left without his sticker book?" wondered Mutsumi. Naru moved to read the letter, but when she did, her face got angry and she threw the paper onto the floor and punched a nearby desk into splinters. Mutsumi went to retrieve the letter and read it, saying, "Ara, Ara," when she finished.

Camera moves over her shoulder so you can read what it says

"I'm sorry that I didn't wait for you two. Please don't look for me," the letter said, still unsigned.

(-O-)

And I thought I'd finish this by this chapter… I've been working on this story for a while now and it seemed convenient to stop here and make a cliffhanger… I know what you think is going to happen. You can keep on thinking it too, I don't mind : )

Note: The Other Me's chapter order is screwy, but its how I plan on leaving it. Though the last chapter updated was chapter 7 according to ff net, it was really chapter ten in the story.

And remember, click the 'Go' button. (Flames are understandable, especially if critical)

Cheers! : )


	8. Tropical Island Romance! Kind Of… Okay, ...

**Book One: The Straw That Broke The Pervert's Back**

**Chapter Eight:** Tropical Island Romance! Kind Of… Okay, Sort Of… Well, Not Really… (Pt1: The Chase!)

**By:** Sci-Fi Raptor

**Disclaimer: **_See Chapter One_

I'm a New Yorker, and a liberal by birth, but the is the FUNNIEST headline I have ever seen (and no, I'm not making fun of their political abilities…):

GAYS PUSH FOR ACTION

On with the show!!!

(-O-)

(Less than a week later)

Naru sat in the corner, her knees tucked to her body and her arms around her legs. She sat there quietly with her face buried between them, but sobs could be heard escaping her once in a while.

"If you want to still have children," Motoko said with an icy edge, "You will tell us where he went."

Everyone was at the lobby at Hinata-sou, interrogating the 'prisoners.' Haitani and Shirai were bound and gagged S&M style, with Motoko hovering threateningly above them. Naru remembered that these two were the last people Keitaro saw yesterday and anything he could have come up with was probably inspired by something they said. Haruka stood next to the doorway, a coiled whip in hand.

"Well, if Haruka was the one interrogating…" the shorter of the two said to himself. The other one heard him and said with anime-style agitation, "Leave me out of your sick fantasies!"

"If you don't tell us where he is, we'll have no choice but to hand you two over to her," Motoko said, with a voice of a professional killer. The person in question was Naru, and she was glaring at the two with angry, bloodshot eyes.

"Alright, alright," the taller piped. "We mentioned to him about this ship that's going to Pararakerusu," he said, stumbling on its name.

"Bananakerusu?" Su exclaimed, suddenly interested. She had magically sat on his head like a frog, her tongue hanging out like a dog's.

"No!" the shorter said. "PARARAKERUSU!"

"Where's that?" Kitsune asked. The two gave dumb stares, causing everyone to deadpan.

Motoko walked up to them, with a twitching eyebrow. She held her katana dangerously in the air and slashed down. In the last second, Haitani said to his friend, "You're the best friend I've ever had!" to which Shirai responded, "I whack off to your mom!" in what they thought would be their final exchange.

But the fatal blow never came. Indeed, their restraints merely slackened. Haitani opened his eyes to find that Motoko was walking away, her sword sheathed. _I'm alive?_ he thought in wonder. He looked to his partner and saw that he too came to the same conclusion. "YOU WHACK OFF TO MY MOM!" he yelled at him, remembering his confession.

"I was kidding… I just wanted to go out with a bang, you know…" Shirai said, touching his index fingers together with an ashamed look.

**Whack! Whack!**

"AAIIIEEEE!!!" the pair screamed in unison, clutching their heads tightly. Haruka, whip unwound, looked down her nose at the two and said, "I think you two have about five more seconds before the girls get seriously pissed off at you…"

The pair looked around to see cold eyes and RHL out of there, thanking their unknown savior for letting them be perverted for yet another day. They made a resolution to hit on as many underage girls as they could.

"So now what?" Kitsune asked, her wry expression replaced with that of a more thoughtful one.

"I dunno…" Haruka said. "I could ask Seta if he knows of the place. Kami-sama knows he's been around," she added and walked to the telephone. She made a quick call and made contact.

"Hey Seta, you know of some island called Pararakerusu?" she asked. The girls got closer in hopes of hearing something good. "You do!" she exclaimed, getting the girls' hopes up. "Oh… that's too bad…" she looked at the girls and saw their pleading looks and explained very quickly that he was actually supposed to go on a dig there, but he missed his ship. She went back to the phone. "So, what are you doing about it? – Uh huh… What?! When? Yeah. Uh-huh… can you hold back for an hour or so? Great! Thanks," she said and hung up as he started professing his eternal love for her.

"WHAT HAPPENED!" the girls said in unison.

"He's flying a plane there himself, but he can only take one more. He said he'd wait an hour, so figure out who's going and _move_!"

Everyone looked to Naru, but she was already gone. They moved to look for her, but they heard the door closing. They all scrambled to the front and saw her already scaling the steps, suitcase in hand.

"Naru-sempai, what about your test results?" Shinobu asked worriedly.  
"Someone just look at it for me. And when I get in, someone send my admission ticket," she shouted and faded away.

"She's really fired up for someone who claims she doesn't care about a certain dork…" Sarah said, getting an approving look from Kitsune.

(O)

(Two days later)

The whole party had gone to Todai to see the results. They scanned the numbers, and as expected, found Naru's posted.

"Yay!" Su and Sarah said and hugged. Nearby, a bunch of jocks were throwing Mutsumi up and down in the air; most likely because she found out she too got in. Everyone one made to leave in a while, but Shinobu lagged behind. More specifically, she was standing on one spot, as if rooted to the position.

"Shinobu-chan, we should get going," Motoko said. But Shinobu didn't reply; she just pointed up at the postings, looking like she'd seen a ghost. Everyone was curious as to why Motoko and Shinobu were standing like two idiots and followed their gaze. They all looked like a bunch of statues.

They saw Keitaro's name.

(Hinata-sou)

"What's the rush?" Haruka said as the Hinata-sou was being turned upside-down.

"Su, Sarah and Shinobu have fled on one of Su's demonic machines to tell Urashima and Naru-sempai that they have gotten into Todai," Motoko said in an annoyed tone.

"And we're going to keep them from getting into any trouble," Kitsune said with a sly grin.

"Or make some?" Haruka asked with an amused face.

"Maybe…" she replied as the rest of the gang filed out.

(O)

"KYAAA!!!" Naru screamed.

"HAHAHAAA!!!" Seta laughed. Their plane was somewhere in the sky, streaking a large pillar of smoke behind it as its engine died and finally exploded. The two had made an emergency evacuation and were now Para-dropping onto the island.

"Why are people trying to kill you!" she screamed at the knucklehead.

"I don't know," he said dumbfounded. "I thought I made a pretty convincing fake-death for them last time…"

"What the hell is wrong with you!!!" she screamed as they crashed into a forest.

"UMPH!" Naru groaned as her 'chute got caught in the trees' branches. She cut her line and fell a few feet. Fortunately, since her butt was so big and the ground pretty soft, the drop didn't hurt as much as it could have.

"I'm beginning to understand how Keitaro feels every time I punch him…" Naru said, rubbing her aching butt.

"I wonder where we are?" Seta mused to himself. Naru looked at him dumbstruck.

"You don't know where we are?" she asked quietly.

"Nope…" Seta said Seta-like.

Brushing all decency aside, Naru screamed, "KYAAA!!!" as she made to strangle him. Fortunately, Seta's brain didn't normally get a lot of blood, so he just stood there, wondering what was wrong with the teen and was largely unaffected.

(Nine hours later)

"Ahh, so there _was_ a village here!" Seta exclaimed as the two broke through the tree line and entered a village.

"Are you telling me we were lost the whole time?" Naru asked, eye twitching.

"Hehe…" Naru fought the urge to violently strangle him again.

"Seta-san!" a deep voice boomed. "You've finally arrived! We were starting to worry you got shot down again!"

The voice belonged to a brute with a large shovel slung over his shoulder.

"Actually, Mario-san, I did…" Seta laughed. The larger Italian man laughed loudly and hugged Seta warmly, picking him up a few feet.

"You never change, do you?" he said, dropping him like a pile of bricks. He glanced over to Naru and said, "And who's this pretty lady? Is she that Haruka-san you're always talking about? She looks younger than I thought she would."

Naru blushed at the mix-up.

"No, this is Narusegawa Naru," Seta introduced. "I used to tutor her back when she went to high school." He looked over at Naru. "This is Mario-san. His team usually helps me out on my digs." Naru shook her small hand with the larger man's, who smiled at her.

"Um… hello…" she said shyly.

"Nyamo?" came a voice behind Mario.

"Nyamo?" Naru repeated. A small girl that was the splitting image of Shinobu came from behind Mario. "Shinobu?! What are you doing here?" Naru exclaimed. "And when did you get a tan?"

"Shinobu?" Seta asked, and then he saw the resemblance (Author pulls hair at his thickskulledness!!!). "Oh, this in Nyamo, she's a girl that's been helping us out on this dig so far," Seta said.

"Nyamo?" the younger girl repeated, though this time she was inspecting the stranger.

"So," the buffer man asked Seta, "Where'd you two land?"

"Somewhere in the southern forest," Seta said offhand.

"Yeah, we even had to cross a desert!" Naru interjected as Nyamo peeked under her skirt, to which Naru started chasing her.

"You mean the one that no one's crossed alive?" Mario asked skeptically.

"What?!" Naru exclaimed, halting her chase.

"Yup," Seta said, Seta-like. Naru almost gave into the urge to strangle him once again, but was run over by something heavy.

"Ooof!" she exclaimed and the thing got off. She was spraled over the ground, her eyes circling. Nyamo looked down at her from her perch from the giant turtle she was riding.

"What?" Mario said when he noticed Seta staring at him.

"Say it…" Seta prodded.

"Say what?" Mario asked, trying to act dumb.

"You know…"

"Dammit Seta, just cause I'm Italian and my name is Mario and I used to have a different job…" he fumed. Seta just stared at him, that expectant face still plastered on him.

"Oh all right," he said, finally giving in. With a (much) higher pitched voice, he said, "It's a me, Mario!"

Seta cracked up and Mario felt a little more dead inside.

(-O-)

Ahh!!! This story is out of control! It just gets longer and longer and my forecasts are as accurate as NASA!!!

(Sigh) Well… that's puts finishing this or The Other Me by the end of break out of the question. And yes… that means sporadic updates…

And remember, click the 'Go' button. (Flames are understandable, especially if critical)

Cheers! : )


	9. Tropical Island Romance! Kind Of… Okay, ...

**Book One: The Straw That Broke The Pervert's Back**

**Chapter Nine:** Tropical Island Romance! Kind Of… Okay, Sort Of… Well, Not Really… (Pt2: Ancient Turtle Civilization!)

**By:** Sci-Fi Raptor

**Disclaimer: **_See Chapter One_

(-O-)

They were everywhere! Left, right, back, front; they had every corner covered. Even if they could fly, there was no escape because they were even crawling all over the trees. Motoko was terrified. There was no way to beat them. Kitsune and Mutsumi were back to back with her, so they had the best tactical position they could manage in the open. Motoko's katana was out and she slashed at the air wildly, coherent thoughts long since gone.

"Motoko-chan," Mutsumi said. "I think you're scaring them."

_She has no understanding of our situation! _Motoko thought. _They aren't afraid; they're there to massacre us!_

"Myu?" Tama chirped, climbing out of Motoko's Hakama. The surrounding turtles quieted down and gazed at their new sister.

"Stay back! Back you t-t-tur—TURTLE!!!" she screamed, lashing out with a 'Rock Splitting Sword.'

(Three hours ago)

"Tell me again why I'm doing this?" Kentaro asked. He was flying his expensive hi-tech airplane-ish vehicle somewhere over some ocean. He felt something cold against his neck. "Oh yeah…" he groaned, when he remembered how the three had basically kidnapped him just as he was about to pick up this girl with whom he'd been swooning over recently and forced him to give them passage to some island called Pararaka-… Pararaku-… "What's the name of this random island I'm supposed to drop you all off to again?" he asked for the forth time.

"PARARAKARUSU!!!" Kitsune yelled, the monotony of the journey getting on her nerves. Everyone looked at her strangely because of her outburst. She hung her head down and said, "I miss sake…" It had turned out that Su's Mecha-Tama® used sake for fuel…

"Ara, Ara, I believe we've arrived!" Mutsumi exclaimed.

"Really?" Kentaro said excitedly. He could drop them there and move on with his life!

"Yes!" Mutsumi said happily, hands clasped.

"Um… which one do we go to?" Kitsune asked. Before them was a formation of islands, which consisted of one large island surrounded by smaller ones.

"That one!" Mutsumi said and pointed to the largest.

Kentaro scanned the island, but found no suitable landing strip. He would have to land on the water.

"Hey, we're gon-" his voice was cut off from the sounds of the wind whipping into the aircraft. Kentaro turned and saw that all but Kitsune was remaining in his craft and she was standing in front of the open door.

"Thanks for the ride!" she said, blowing him a kiss and jumping off. He scrambled to close the door and sat back into the pilot's seat heavily.

"It seems that my involvement in this story now comes to a close," he said contently. His computer gave off an alarm.

"NO!!!" he shouted when he found that his right engine failed. "Curse the author for making me suffer so!!!"

Suddenly, his engine stuttered back to life and he calmed down. "Good thing I bribed him after watching the Love Hina anime…" he said and merrily made his way back to Japan. Unfortunately for him, the reason that his engine had failed momentarily was because a flying turtle had bumped its head against it and its parents saw the act…

-

Kitsune just realized the obvious and she knew she wouldn't like the answer to her question. "Mutsumi, how did you know that this is the island Keitaro's on?" she shouted.

"It was the biggest, so I thought it was probably the right one!" she shouted back. Kitsune groaned internally and missed her stash of sake all the more.

(O)

Sarah was bent over against the Mech-Tama's® side, most likely heaving. She'd been heaving ever since they descended from eleven hundred meters. The water below them was shimmering as they shot past at several hundreds of clicks an hour.

"Su, how much longer till we can land?" Shinobu asked. "I don't know if Sarah can last much longer…" As if to emphasize her point, Sarah made a few more retching sounds. Su only chanted "Birdy, birdy in the sky… Dropped some whitewash in my eye… Gee am I glad cows don't fly!"

"Auu…" Shinobu cowered, being largely ignored. She looked out and saw something… she squinted her eyes and found that it was an island! To be more specific, it was an array of small islands surrounding a larger one.

BEEP! BEEP!

Shinobu looked to see what the computer was complaining about and saw something come out of a hidden panel.

"Su, what's going on!" Shinobu asked frantically.

"Target locked on!" Su said, and pushed a button. Several large Dolby Digital 5.1 Surround Sound speakers came out of the floor and started blasting "Hey Ya!"

"You're mine for sure!" Su said and slowed the Mecha-Tama to a more manageable speed. Sarah had just passed out and Shinobu frantically tried to keep her from falling off. They rapidly approached a forest and descended such that the forest's ceiling was scraping the bottom of the vehicle.

"You can't escape now!" Su said, laughing maniacally. "Switch on!" she said and pushed a button. The craft was jolted up momentarily and suddenly pulled back, killing a little bit of speed. They ascended a bit and traveled for a little more to decelerate and landed somewhere south of the intercept in a desert. The Tama's legs extened down more than usually so that they were a bit more elevated than normal and so that they could make room for them to become buried under the sand. Scorching sand.

Su jumped down and ran under the Mecha-Tama to see what her capture net had caught. She opened it to find a…

(O)

"TURTLE!!!" Motoko shrieked and subsequently fainted. Kitsune sweat dropped while Tama-chan landed on Mutsumi's shoulder and snuggled against her face.

"That was naughty, Tama-chan… you shouldn't have sneaked into Motoko-chan's clothing like that." Tama gave an apologetic 'Myu' and suddenly perked up. It flew away hurriedly 'Myu'-ing while being followed by the horde of larger land turtles.

Kitsune started saying, "I wonder what scared her off," but was unceremoniously cut off when something smacked her from the side. When she regained her senses, she found that they were suspended in some type of transparent bag in the air. She looked up and saw what seemed to be a large metallic… turtle?

"SU!!!" Ktisune yelled angrily and screamed a string of obscenities until they landed.

"Oh my…" Mutsumi said just as Su opened the net.

"Tama-chan! I've finally caught you!" Su said happily, but stopped mid-jump when she realized all that was before her were three well-endowed women. "Hey! You're not Tama-chan!" Su said accusingly.

"Su! I thought we were here to find Keitaro!" Shinobu said, coming up from behind, clutching her backpack in her arms.

"Keitaro?" Su asked quizzically.

"Yeah, idiot!" Sarah said and smacked her in the head, partially for revenge over the evil flight and partially out of habit.

"Oh, then I shoulda brought my Keitaro Radar®," she said, scratching her head.

"YOU DIDN'T BRING THE KEITARO RADAR!!!" Sarah said, seriously pissed off.

"Oops…" she said, but suddenly remembered something. "I still have the Banana Radar®!" she said happily and run to the deck. She came back down a few minutes later with a gloomy, tear-streaked face. "There's no bananas!" she said and cried. Shinobu held her to comfort her in her time of need. Sarah just deadpanned, thinking, _This is all just a dream… a horrible, horrible dream…_

(O)

"Bakabakabakabakabakabakabakabakabakabakabakabakabakabakabakabaka."

Naru was banging Seta repeatedly on the head, going like that for minutes at a time, resting, then going at it again. Naru was finally spent and went to get a drink.

"But diet was all we had…" he whined, rubbing his head a bit.

"Nyamo…" Nyamo 'Nyamo'-ed and cowered behind the older male.

They had been digging for a while with no result. The crew was taking a break for now, since the sun was at its most treacherous. (Sun: Hahahaa! Bow down before your master, you little cretins!!!)

Yeah…

"Kyaaa!" Naru screamed. Seta jolted up to see what had happened, followed by Nyamo. He heard her voice from somewhere nearby, but he couldn't see her.

"Naru! Where are you!" he said frantically.

"Here!" she yelled.

"Where!"

"HERE!!!"

Seta still couldn't see her. He knew that she was very thirsty when she had stopped hitting him, and she did have to go through quite some sunlight to get to the watering hole, so he came to the only possible conclusion.

"Are you dead?" he asked, shuddering. Spirits anchored to this world caused a host of trouble to the people they knew. "Its all right Naru… go _towards_ the light…"

"BAKA!" she yelled, and threw a rock at his big fat head. He looked down and saw her in a pit, fuming.

"Oh, hi there Naru, I didn't see you," he said, hand behind his head.

"GET ME OUT!!!"

Seta came back a few minutes later with a rope. Nyamo was watching her the whole time and learned to stay off of her nerves, because she kept on saying how she'd kill Seta for being such a baka and generally destroyed the earth around her during her temper tantrum.

"Grab this!" Seta said as he threw a rope down. Naru grabbed it and started climbing up the side of the pit, like she was walking up a wall. Her foot landed on a soft patch of dirt.

Click!

RumbleRumbleRumble…

"Seta! What's going on!" Naru said, petrified. The whole place was shaking and she was loosing her grip.

"Hold on tight! Nyamo is going to get some help!" he said. Naru felt something wet on her face. She looked in front of her and saw the side of the pit facing her dripping water. No, streaming water… no, _gushing_ water!

"Naru! Don't let go!" Seta pleaded as Mario's crew helped pull her up. Naru held onto the rope with a vice-like grip, brooding over how she'd kill Seta when she got up.

Pfft…

Naru hands moved to cover her beet-red face before she even registered what had happened. She _was_ the envy of all Japanese women, and something like… that was just too embarrassing.

"Help me!" she screamed, as the current swept her away.

"Naru!" Seta said, chasing after her. _If Haruka finds out she died under my watch, I'll _never_ get any!_

Naru fought against the current with her all, but the water's flow had somuch turbulence that she was shoved this way and that, making it all but impossible to travel in any desired direction. She glanced above water once in a while and noticed Nyamo, Seta and Mario's crew scrambling to keep up with her, but she was being swept away too quickly.

THUD!

"AIIEEE!!!" Naru shrieked, clutching her big fat butt (which had been acting like a flotation device). She had crashed into something hard, which thankfully, was rooted to the ground and held her still as the water forked past it. The water's flow seemed to ebb, and by the time everyone else had caught up, the water level started to fall.

"Naru, are you okay?" Seta hollered from the other side.

"All I wanted was a little water…" she sobbed to herself, sitting on the hard thingy.

"Nyamo…" the small girl said, tugging Seta's elbow.

"Yes, Nyamo, I'm glad that she's safe too," Seta said, more for himself than Naru.

"Nyamo!" she said again, tugging harder.

"Yes Nyamo, I did remember to wear fresh underpants," Seta said, still not understanding what the girl wanted. A vein in her forehead throbbed and she jumped and smacked him like Sarah with Su and pointed at the large hard thingy Naru had been saved by.

"Yes Nyamo, that large tablet inscribed with the ancient Turtle language did save Naru. Good thing it was there or we would have a disaster on our hands!" Seta said and started to walk away.

"SETA, YOU BAKA! LOOK AT THE STUPID TABLET THAT SAVED NARU! IT SHOWS WHERE THE ANCIENT TURTLE CIVILIZATION IS THAT MY GRANDFATHER WAS LOOKING FOR!" Nyamo screamed at him (along with the Author!), fuming. Everyone looked at the girl who made the outburst strangely, since all she had ever said was 'Nyamo.'

"Nyamo…" Seta started, looking serious. "You can talk?"

Nyamo suppressed the urge to strangle him, since she had seen that when Naru did it to him, it had no effect. Instead, she opted to sob next to Naru, who was brought over from the tablet by Mario's crew. Mario went up to the girl and patted her head gingerly, knowing how she was feeling from past experience.

Naru cried, "I wanna go home!" while Nyamo cried, "Why is he so dumb!" The two held onto each other for comfort, crying on the other's shoulder.

(-O-)

More legal stuff:

The Mecha-Tama is probably owned by someone, so before you decide to build such a nuclear powered vehicle of cuteness and destruction, please consult with its intellectual owners…

Also, if you decide to build a radar that searches for a Japanese pervert that lives in an all girls dorm with a violent auburn haired girl and a kendo-practicing she-witch and blonde foreigner with a knack for creating illegal technology, etc., whose name's Keitaro Urishima, please consult the proprietor's of said device.

Same goes for if said radar searches for bananas.

Song by OutKast

And remember, click the 'Go' button. (Flames are understandable, especially if critical)

Cheers! : )


	10. Tropical Island Romance! Kind Of… Okay,

**Book One: The Straw That Broke The Pervert's Back**

**Chapter Ten: **Tropical Island Romance! Kind Of… Okay, Sort Of… Well, Not Really… (Pt3: Romantic Beach Dinner)

**By:** Sci-Fi Raptor

**Disclaimer:** _See Chapter One_

Three chapters length to make up for the delay…

**I'm not really sure what happened, but ff net had the old version of this chapter posted for some reason, so I decided to put up the correct version. I'll try and update soon too, since I've been so lax this summer.**

(-O-)

They were everywhere! Left, right, back, front; they had every corner covered. Even if they could fly, there was no escape because they were even hovering above, spinning menacingly. Motoko was terrified. There was no way that she could beat their staggering numbers. Kitsune, Mutsumi and the minors were back to back with her, so they had the best tactical position they could manage in the open. Motoko's katana was out and she slashed wildly into the air, coherent thoughts long since gone.

"Motoko-chan," Mutsumi said. "I think that you're scaring them."

_She has no understanding of our situation!_ Motoko thought. _They aren't afraid; they're here to massacre us!_

"They look so tasty…" Su drooled, eyes spiraling.

"Stay back! Back you t-t-tur—TURTLES!" she screamed, lashing out with a 'Rock Splitting Sword.'

_This is getting very annoying…_ Kitsune thought, sweat dropping.

(Three hours ago)

"YOU DIDN'T BRING THE KEITARO RADAR!" Sarah yelled, seriously pissed off.

"Oops…" Su said, but suddenly remembered something. "I still have the Banana Radar!" she said happily and ran to the deck. She came back down a dew minutes later with a gloomy, tear-streaked face. "There's no bananas!" she said and cried. Shinobu held her to comfort her in her time of need. Sarah just deadpanned, thinking, _This__ is all just a dream… a horrible, horrible dream…_

"Well, we best better get going, cause we ain't gon find Keitaro standin' here all day," Kitsune said, getting off of her feet.

"Yeah," Shinobu agreed, "If we don't hurry, Sempai's not gonna get into Tokyo U again!" Everyone filed into the Mecha-Tama ender the blazing desert sun and waited with anticipation to leave the wasteland Su had landed in the middle of for some reason.

…

"Su, what's taking so long? We're shriveling up here!" Sarah said, hand covering her face to block out the evil sun's rays. Her brow was soaked with sweat even though they had been exposed for only five minutes.

"Um… we're out of Sake…" Su said, looking at them with sad puppy eyes.

"YOU HAVE SAKE!" Kitsune shrieked wistfully. "WHERE? WHERE? GIMME! GIMME! GIMME!"

"If I recall correctly, Su's monstrosity is fueled by alcohol…" Motoko said coolly. Kitsune stopped where she stood and had a crazed look on her face.

"What are you talking about, Captain Morgan? There's a bottle of your finest right in front of me!" Kitsune said and grabbed Motoko's neck, trying to pop her 'cork' off.

"Ahh! Kitsune-sempai! That's Motoko!" Shinobu cried and tried to get her off the girl, who for reason had a frozen expression on her face. The girls forced Kitsune off of the younger and comforted her when she had her wits about her. But the interlude ended abruptly with the sound of a katana being unsheathed.

"Die vile creatures!" shrieked and released a 'Rock Splitting Sword.' The girls shifted their gazes to where Motoko had struck and saw that Tama-chan had been intercepted by Motoko's attack and was caught by a group of angry looking turtles.

"**Mew…**" they said with low, angry voices. Their burning red eyes focused on the large metallic turtle that had dealt defeat to their master with a cheap attack.

"**Mew!**" they said in unison and went into their shells. They started spinning at amazing speeds and hovered into the air. They started flinging themselves at the Mecha-Tama and ripped chunks off at a time from the impacts.

"Abandon ship!" Su said and jumped off with the grace of a ballerina. Everyone else followed suit, though with less grace. The flying land turtles decimated the Mecha-tama into slag within minutes as the girls watched helplessly nearby.

"Darn… I knew I shoulda paid the ten dollar insurance fee to the rental company…" Su said, smacking herself.

"You didn't build that yourself?" Shinobu piped in.

"Naw… if I'd built it, it'd use bananas for fuel, not Sake," she replied. Shinobu pretended she never asked the question, not wanting to know where Su had acquired the Mecha.

"Ara, Ara… we should get out of here while they're distracted," Mutsumi said. The girls agreed and quietly left the scene. Unfortunately, the land-turtles had finished their assault and saw the girls sneaking away.

"Mew…" a turtle said. (What are those strange bipeds?)

"Mew…" another answered. (Are they not the creatures that attacked the Great One earlier?)

"MEW!" yet another one answered, (Indeed! It is they!) and they all made chase.

(Where we first met our heroines this chapter)

They were glaring at them and even Mutsumi was starting to worry about their intentions. They receded into their shells again and started spinning quickly, but then burrowed underground. Hoping that they could use this chance, the girls ran as quickly as they could.

"I wonder what those turtles are up to?" Shinobu mused.

"Dun' matter! Just keep runnin'!" Kitsune ordered.

BOOM!

The girls ran all out after the explosion and ran even faster when they realized that they were being attacked by the turtles' desert power, 'Sandy Sand Attack!' (Which Mutsumi conveniently translated for them). Large pillars of sand erupted all around them, shredding their clothing and robbing them of the little moisture they still retained. Dehydration caused by the unforgiving desert sun didn't take long to overcome them and they all collapsed in the burning sand.

(O)

The sound of running water could be heard all around. She felt wetness about her body and got up with a jolt. Kitsune opened her eyes to find all of the girls playing in a stream created by a large foaming waterfall, all wearing vegetative bikinis.

_Vegetative bikinis?_ She thought. Strangely, she herself was wearing one of the awkward attire, thought she did fill it in quite nicely.

"Are we in heaven?" she asked when she could speak. There was no way that they could have survived the unmerciful attack by the turtles.

"More like h-h-hell!" Motoko stuttered and slapped one of the land-turtles away from snacking on her hastily fabricated 'garments.'

"What's going on!" Kitsune asked when she realized that they were in an oasis of sorts and that their pursuers were now playing tag in the stream with the minors among the six.

"Tama-chan was kind enough to convince her new friends that we were also friends and they brought us to their secret desert oasis…" Mutsumi said, feeding a smiling Tama perched on her shoulder some small fruit.

"Great…" Kitsune said. They were supposed to be looking for someone gone MIA, not become MIA. _Though technically, we were just looking for the brats…_ "So, what do we do now?"

"For now, we should just try and relax while the sun is still up. We can't really do anything till nighfall," Mutsumi said and went to take a dip into the stream.

"Ah, that makes sense," Kitsune said to herself, thinking clearly. Then her head went down. _I miss sake…_

(O)

"Why are we driving over this arid desert again?" Naru asked her mentor.

"Because the missing link to the ancient turtle civilization just might be in the location described in the tablet you found," Seta said. "You're becoming quite the archeologist. You might even be better that my part timer!"

"Keitaro?" she asked. _Oh yeah… I'm supposed to be looking for him. But where to look?_

"Um… why is Nyamo coming with us? Isn't she a bit young?"

"My grandfather went out in search of this place and I think he might still be there," she answered. Seta had told Naru her story before, and she could only hope that the poor girl wouldn't be hit too hard when she found out that her grandfather was long gone. Nyamo went back to petting her large pet turtle that wouldn't seem to leave her side.

Naru looked out her window and was surprised to see what looked like the more prominent building of Todia grow larger and closer. "Seta! Go there!" she said and turned the wheel sharply.

"Ah! Thank you so much Naru! I knew I was going the wrong direction when we passed the skeleton mound a few minutes ago…"

"You didn't know where we were going all this time?" Naru said unemotionally.

"I do now!" he said, avoiding the question somewhat.

_Why did I ever like this guy? _She asked herself, looking out the window dejectedly. _I don't care, I have to worry Keitaro. And if I know him, he's most likely over there, crying over how he wished he were at the real Todai… Maybe if I didn't push him so hard, he wouldn't have run away like that. Or maybe…_ Naru continued with the 'what ifs' until they arrived before the pillar that resembled Todai's most prominent building.

"Hey, I think I see natives!" Seta exclaimed. He honked his horn and stuck his head out the driver-side window and said, "Hello natives! Do you know where the ruins to the ancient turtle civilization are?"

Naru had already left the van, followed by Nyamo and her pet and greeted the 'natives.'

"Kitsune, Motoko, Mutsumi, Shinobu, Su, Sarah! What are you guys doing here?"

"It all really comes down to us wanting to tell ya'll that you and Keitaro have made it into Todai!" Kitsune answered, hugging her best friend of many years. "Congratulations!"

"Really? YES!" Naru said, overjoyed and the two jumped up and down in unison, holding hands, silly smiles plastered over their faces.

"I'm so happy for you, Naru-sempai…" Shinobu said, wiping a tear.

"Yahoo!" Su said, jumping like crazy. The rest of the girls gave their own congratulations.

"Naru! Great job with making first contact!" Seta said, finally catching up. "I can't believe that the natives here speak Japanese! They look really familiar too, especially the little blonde haired one…"

The 'little blonde haired one,' a.k.a. Sarah, ran up to him and kicked him in the shin. When he bent down in pain, she grabbed onto his neck and yelled, "It's me, papa!" in an overjoyed voice.

"Sarah," he said, finally recognizing his charge. "How nice to see you! Since when were you a native of Pararakerusu?"

Everyone but Sarah largely ignored him from that point on.

"So, where's Kei- er… Urashima?" Motoko asked, coming out of her reverie. Everyone looked at Naru expectantly, but she gave a grave look.

"We've looked all over, but we couldn't find him. I thought that this was the last place he could be…" Naru said, tear stricken.

"Everyone stayed quiet, sure that their adventure had finally come to a close.

_And I was so looking forward to getting some real dirt between the two lovebirds,_ Kitsune thought disappointedly.

"Hey look at this!" Seta said. He was crouched near a hiding place that had a good view of the girls' bathing area, but had two lines of blood shooting out. Also, there was a fresh trail leading away from there.

"Hmmm… two streaks of blood coming from a hiding place that overlooked our bathing area, and a fresh path leading away from it?" Kitsune mused. "Does that remind anyone else of a certain pervert?" she asked with a toothy grin.

"Keitaro!" Naru said enthusiastically and the gang followed the track.

"At least you're good for something, papa!" Sarah said from her perch on Seta's shoulders. Tama fluttered this way and that as Nyamo's pet (I dunno his name, so I'll call him Big Tama) tried to kiss it. The other turtles seemed to be laughing, in a turtle sort of way…

The path snaked along lazily and dragged on and on. It was needless to say that the group was quickly bored and started getting easily agitated in the hot, humid tropical environment.

"Bananas…" Su whimpered randomly. Shinobu and Nyamo (who had already gotten over their uncanny semblance) flanked her and did their best to comfort their grief-stricken friend.

"Oof!" someone groaned from the jungle.

"Kyaa!" Naru screamed when she realized that the person who had 'Oofed' had fallen off of a tree and landed right next to her.

"Die vermin," Motoko screamed to no apparent reason and lashed out at the intruder with an 'Evil Cutting Blade.' Everything went silent, even the forest, as the dust settled. Moments later, the dust cleared and everyone was surprised to find that the intruder was…

"Mario?" Naru and Nyamo said in unison. The forest went back into an explosion of noise, as if to accentuate the shock.

"Oy… mi amore…" Mario said in a daze.

"Mario?" Seta asked again, moving to help the brute up.

**Shing**

"Who is this vile creature who dared to defile innocent Naru-sempai?" Motoko said, appearing out of nowhere with her blade against Mario's neck.

"Motoko-chan," Seta said, punching a nearby tree and magically pulling out a bokken from its fragments. "Is that any way to treat a friend?"

"Is that a challenge?" replied in a defensive stance, her own bokken magically in hand, with her blade sheathed.

"Olay!" Seta said, jumping into the sky.

"Hiya!" Motoko yelled, making chase. The air suddenly started pulsing with the shockwaves resounding from the incredibly powerful impacts cause by their bokkens slashing into the other's.

"Hello, tall dark and handsome…" Kitsune said, slowly making her way to the newcomer.

"Mario, what happened to you? What are you doing here?" Naru asked, helping him to his feet with Nyamo's help.

"I don't really know…" he said, nervously looking this way and that like he was looking for something. "I was eating some sautéed mushrooms back in the camp, when all of a sudden, I heard this angry voice say 'All work and no play make Author mad!' And here I am, falling down here for no apparent reason…"

"Maybe it was a ghost?" Mutsumi conjectured. Su suddenly started bouncing around and exclaimed, "Never fear, Su's Ghost Buster Gear is here!" She suddenly donned on a high-tech looking outfit that included a green visor, a gun twice the size of her body and a cylinder of some sort strapped to her back which had a tube of some sort coming out that was being fed by the back of the gun.

"Pain hurts…" Mario grumbled just as Su fired a yellow arc at him.

K-k-crackkk!

Static residue seemed to build around the muzzle as everyone turned to look at the carnage. Surprisingly, the damage was light; only Mario was hit. He looked barbequed and coughed out some smoke just before he collapsed.

"Hehe… forgot to discharge it," Su giggled. "But now it's ready!" and aimed again at Mario's soon to be corpse.

"No!" everyone said and wrestled the WMD from her.

"Didn't anyone notice that it would be physically impossible for her to have had all of that?" said Sarah. "It's at least twice her weight!"

"Banana!" Su said excitedly and jumped out of her gear. She landed on a tree that she conveniently noticed before Sarah could insinuate any kind of author related conspiracy…

"I think everyone would be content with her being distracted…" Kitsune said, her hand on her head.

"Ara, Ara…" Mutsumi agreed.

SLAM!

Motoko landed… ungracefully (being liberal) followed by Seta pointing his bokken down at her.

"You need to work more on your guard, Motoko! Your guard!"

"How could I lose…" Motoko said, ashamed.

"Auu…" Shinobu whimpered quietly. "Shouldn't we start looking for Sempai?" she said with a strange single-mindedness.

"Yeah…" Naru said. "This place is starting to creep me out… So many weird things are happening here…"

"Did someone call for me?" Su shouted from her perch on the banana tree.

"We're heading out!" Kitsune shouted back, after Mario was revived by some of Seta's famous Shiatsu techniques.

"Wee!" Su shrilled merrily, gliding to the ground with a few bunches of bananas strapped to her back. The group hadn't traveled ten feet when something felt wrong…

"Something feels wrong…" Motoko said, katana in hand, effectively halting the group. It felt like how she felt that time before Kitsune had gotten her drunk and did unmentionable sins…

"You're just being paranoid," Kitsune said and continued walking. "See, nothing's—"

Click

Kitsune looked down and saw her foot on a hidden depression. Before she could complain about how she missed Sake, the ground below the group fell, with them along with it.

"Ah!" the majority screamed.

"Yahoo!" Seta and a monkey shouted.

"So hungry..." Mario complained.

"Oof!" Oofed everyone ad they landed on something squishy seconds later.

"Where are we?" Shinobu whimpered, grabbing hold of her seemingly identical twin.

"It looks like some kind of cavern," Seta said, turning on his hardhat's integrated light.

"Ewww!" Naru and Sarah groaned when they realized that the soft stuff that they had landed on was made of cobwebs and moss. Suddenly, the whole cavern lit up as torches along the walls seemed to spontaneously combust into life, taking everyone by surprise. Not one to be scared by such events, Seta moved towards a tunnel that came to view due to the illumination in a casual manner.

"This looks like the gothic style equivalent of the turtle civilization," Seta noted in wonder as the group followed him cautiously. "But I thought that era was a myth… That's when Demon Lord—"

"Ooo… what's this button do?" Su asked as she pushed a large red button that had a lot of scribbles written across it.

"No, Su! Not that button!" Seta said when he realized what it said on it.

Click

…

Nothing happened, so the group gave a collective sigh of relief, though it became apparent that they had sighed too soon.

**Baboom**something exploded and the whole place started shaking.

Screechhh…

Bam!

A cage suddenly fell from the ceiling, but only Mario managed to jump away in time. But that turned out to be the least of their worries, since the whole place started shifting. Before they knew it, the walls and ceiling had receded over 100 feet each and exposed that the floor was really a free floating island in a lake of smothering lava.

"Bwahahaa!" a deep, scary voice bellowed. Everyone looked up to see something else fall down from the ceiling to the other end of the platform. It must have weighed many tons, since it tipped over the whole island, causing the cage that the group was in to roll around dangerously.

"Foolish mortals! Who was stupid enough to release me, the King of Fire?" the thing said. Everyone looked at it and was shocked to find a…

"TURTLE!" Motoko screamed and whipped out a chi attack. Unfortunately, the cage they were in was magically hardened and the attack bounced around inside. Luckily, the cage also dampened the effect, so only Seta felt any serious affects, since he was the first person the attack bounced to. The creature stood on two legs, had spikes all over its body and shell, and had metal rings, collars and bracelets. It also had large, sharp teeth and was exhaling fire.

"Oh mi gosh!" Seta said, largely unaffected by Motoko's attack. "That's the Fire Demon Lord Bowser!"

"Bowser?" everyone questioned, wondering about the coincidence that they happened to meet what everyone thought was a Super Nintendo character. Everyone looked at Seta with confused faces.

"Didn't you know?" Seta said. "The whole Mario Brothers series was actually based on the ancient Turtle Civilization." Then, with an unemotional face and zombie-like voice, "Everything is based on the glorious ancient Turtle Civilization… All hail Fire Demon Lord Bowser…"

"Huh?" those in the case said to his sudden amendment.

"All hail Fire Demon Lord Bowser…" he repeated. Everyone stared in horror as his eyes turned red and he grew fangs. Before anyone knew what was happening, he lunged at the nearest girl and bit her… vegetative clothing off!

"Auu!" Shinobu cried, covering herself in teary embarrassment as Seta moved to the next girl.

"PERVERT!" Naru and Motoko screamed, lashing out automatically. But everyone went bug-eyed when the two reeled their bruised hands back. Seta turned away from a heavily breathing Kitsune with a toothy grin, completely untouched by their assault.

"Lord Bowser has commanded me to destroy all panties!" he said as he lunged at the two. Mario smacked himself to get back his wits, doing his best to avoid looking into the caged orgy.

"I think I have to beat this Demon King so that they don't castrate Seta for this later…" Mario said to himself. As if in afterthought, he added, "Maybe I should wait a few moments."

"Bwahahahahaa!" The turtle bellowed and exhaled fire in the direction of the cage.

"I'll just get him back later…" Mario sighed. He punched the cage away, getting it out of the way at the last second. It was so close to the fire, he thought he heard one of the occupants say something about their hair being on fire.

_I have to beat him, but how? _Mario thought. As if the heavens were listening to his wishes, unlike that time when he gambled his family's multibillion dollar company away while drunk in Vegas, something floated down and Mario grabbed it before Fire Demon Lord Bowser could turn it into ashes. He turned it around and found that it was a red hat, with a big M written on the front. Taped onto it was a letter Mario took off and read it. It said:

Dear Mario,

It's me, Luigi, your long lost twin brother. I don't have much time to write this, so I'll get to the point. Bowser killed me many years before you will receive this letter. Don't worry about how this letter came to you, all will be explained by the Toad stools. For now, you have to beat the Fire Demon Lord Bowser and stop him from resurrecting his army of undead couch potatoes. The only way for you to avenge me and defeat him is to wear this power hat. What you have to do is grab him by the tail and throw him to the four spiked bombs at the edge of the island. When you throw him at all four, he'll turn into stone and you can leave this dungeon. But be careful; every time a bomb goes off, a piece of the island will fall into the lake.

Good Luck,

Your Brother, Luigi

P.S. Stay away from the yellow mushrooms. The other ones are good for you.

Mario stared at the letter a little bit longer after finishing the last line.

"You have got to be kidding me!" he cried in dismay. Before he could say anything else, Fire Demon Lord Bowser jetted flames in his direction and burned the letter just as it was between his hands. Mario managed to jump back and away in time to avoid getting burned and stared down at his adversary after recovering.

Putting the hat firmly on his head, he said, "Let's go," in a dark voice.

"Ha!" he said, jumping once.

"Whohoo!" he said, jumping again, and higher than before.

"Yipee!" he said jumping a third time, higher than that last two times. Little wings magically appeared on the sides of the hat and he suddenly had the ability to glide. With a steely look on his face, he swooped down to give a crippling blow to the Demon, which jumped back in surprise at his newfound abilities.

(X Scene too graphic for this story's rating X)

Mario ripped off the dented bars of the cage holding the group within and helped Naru out first, since her big butt gave her some sort of buoyancy that put her at the top of the pile.

"Oof…" Naru said as she was lifted off of her butt. Mario pulled out each of the occupants one by one, sending some of them almost flying with his newfound strength.

"Why does my face feel like I was slapped over and over?" Seta said sitting on the floor and rubbing his face. One of the girls would have enlightened him over his predicament, but they knew he was an idiot and that they knew he was under Fire Demon Lord Bowser's control while inside the cage.

"Thanks for letting us out…" Naru said, doing her best to cover herself up. Mario had been considerate enough to shut his eyes during their evacuation and kept them so, but Naru will felt exposed.

"No problem," he said. Even after defeating a Fire Demon Lord, Mario still seemed to be able to take everything in stride. "You guys know how to get out of here," he continues, pointing to an exit at the other side of the now solid lava lake. "So, I'm gonna see where this thing will take me," he finished, mentioning the bright star-shaped object floating over the stone body of the defeated.

"Well, its been good meeting you. I hope you find Princess Peach…" Naru said uncertainly.

"It's okay, Naru. I'm not really sure if I believe it myself… Imagine me, the chosen one who will bring peace to the universe!" he said, laughing. "But I'm always felt that something was missing in my life, and I think that this is it. This is the pasta to my meatball! I don't know why, but I feel like I've been waiting for this all of my life, so I'm gonna take this chance," he continued with a face of determination on his face that is only seen once every e7 x 106 people.

Finding nothing better to say to the determined man, Naru said, "I hope you stay safe."

"Thanks Naru," he said with a serious face. "Besides, anything's safer that working with him!" he laughed, pointing to Seta, who had Sarah on his shoulders covering his eyes. He could tell it was him because Seta was complaining the loss of sight. Mario started his jumping sequence and grabbed the star on his final jump. The star shook violently and he disappeared, just like that!

The girls cautiously walked across the solidified lava lake and hustled outside. Once out, they took a breather and fabricated their vegetative clothing once again. With that matter settled, they continued onto their original path, careful to stay wary of other hidden traps. Fortunately, the only thing they encountered was some sort of aggressive giant beetle, which Su scared away because of the look of hunger on her face. "It's a delicacy," she explained after they caught up to her, finding her empty handed. "My people thought we hunted them to extinction because of daddy's feasts."

Going on…

They had been trekking for nearly half an hour until they broke the forest line… and almost fell to their deaths off of a sheer cliff! Seta recognized the hazard in time and managed to stop everyone from plunging to their doom. Actually, since Naru was at front, everyone bumped into her, causing her to fall over. Motoko's quick reflexes let her grab hold of Naru's hand in time, and the group helped pull her up. Since Naru was so heavy, she crashed into the group with a resounding Thump.

"Hey," Su said, from under the pile. Her head was sticking out from the bottom of the pile and had a very good view of the coastline that the cliff went down to. Obviously, the rock formation they were on was created by the tides over millions of years of erosion. "There's someone down there next to that big rock!"

"Really? Who?" Kitsune asked. Everyone went back into a more respectable position and they all peered down the cliff.

"He's short," Kitsune said.

"He seems Asian…" Mutsumi added.

"And there are two lines of blood trailing him!" Sarah finished. Putting two and two together, Naru realized who it was.

"The boogeyman!" Su said excitedly and whipped out her Ghost Buster Gear and aimed at the person in question.

"No!" everyone said and confiscated the weapon from her, yet again, thought no one knew how she had gotten it back in the first place.

"Aww… you guys are no fun…" Su chided. _Good thing they stopped me though. I was out of range and it would have been so embarrassing if I didn't hit…_

"Keitaro!" Naru shouted, and all but jumped after him. Conveniently forgetting the distance between them and height of the sheer cliff. Luckily, Motoko managed to grab her by the ankle, causing her to swivel down and hit the side of the cliff with her face. Motoko slowly got up and brought Naru up with a single outstretched arm. Seta nodded in approval while everyone else gaped. Motoko gave out a rare silly grin, taking their unspoken compliment with less stride than usual. However, since Motoko was just on the edge of the cliff and Naru was fat, the ground below her could not support their combined weight and crumbled down the side. Seta grabbed Motoko's ankles in time, but the two falling girls' combined momentum dragged him with them. The other girls acted quickly enough and piled on top of Seta's legs just as he too fell over, stopping the three with a jolt.

"Heave!" Mutsumi said delightfully.

"Ho!" the rest of the girls grunted as they pulled the three up.

"Let me go!" Naru said angrily.

"But then you'll fall to your death!" Kitsune said, pissed off at her best friend's headstrong attitude for a man that she claimed that was just a 'friend.' "Just wait a little till we find a safe way down!"

"I did find a safe way down!" Naru argued. "So let me go!"

"Naru-sempai… please calm down…" Shinobu mumbled as Naru started having a temper tantrum. Just as they were about to bring Motoko up, Motoko lost her grip on Naru's ankle and she tumbled down to her seemlingly death.

"No! Naru-sempai!" Motoko said and she was suddenly pulled up due to the loss of ballast. She landed on her front, but she didn't bother to get up. She slammed her fist down nearby, saying, "If only I were stronger…"

"What the hell are you guys waiting for?" Naru yelled from the great beyond. "Hurry up and follow me!"

"Naru… go towards the light," Seta said.

"BAKA!" Naru yelled and threw something that miraculously landed on his head. It happened to be a vine with a rock tied to the end. Everyone went to the ledge and found that Naru was only ten feet lower, on a barely discernable path that led to the shoreline below. "So, what are you guys waiting for?" Naru asked impatiently. Needless to say, they were safely at the bottom of the cliff soon after. With a running start, Naru quickly closed the distance between her and Keitaro's unconscious body. Closely following behind was Motoko, while the rest straggled behind. When Naru and Motoko were within fifteen feet of Keitaro, Seta suddenly yelled for them to stop.

"WHAT!" Naru said irritably, a vein visibly throbbing on her forehead.

"Why would he be lying there unconscious? Something did that to him, and I think that statue was that something!" Seta said, signs of agitation showing through his normal farce of nonchalance. What they had thought was a rock from their perch on the top of the cliff actually turned out to be a statue of a giant turtle that looked like a blown up version of Big Tama, which also happened to be the only thing between Naru and her prize. She continued, completely ignoring his warning soon followed by the rest. Naru was the first to reach him, and crouched down by his side. Motoko stood standing next to her, her face unnaturally devoid of emotion. The rest of the girls were a few paces away.

_I have to teach him a lesson about being such a baka when we get back…_ Naru thought, her fists ready to relieve some of the tension this adventure cause. _But maybe I should be nice to him… then he wont feel like he had to run away from me like this…_ another part of her thought, one that caught her by surprise. "I'll deal with that later…" she grumbled to herself, too consumed with ending her quest to be angry at herself for even thinking along those lines. She had to make sure he was okay now, and she turned him over to find that he was…

"My grandpa?" Nyamo squawked in surprise. The whole group had caught up and was now surrounding the man in question.

"Grandpa?" everyone else exclaimed.

"**MEW!**" thundered the suddenly enervated statue. It thundered towards them, arcs of thunder cracking across the sky with every step. Everyone made a mad dash away from the statue, the old man all but forgotten. Nyamo stood by him in a last ditch effort to wake him up, but luckily for her, to statue just past her and went on to chase the rest of the group. Sensing that the group was tiring too rapidly, Naru and Motoko glanced at each other and nodded. In a dramatic show of defiance, Motoko stopped with her katana pointing at it in a dangerous manner while Naru held her dukes up. The statue also stopped and gave a loud howl toward the sky in a show of dominance. Thunder cracled in the sky and shot to the ground, instantly creating a sophisticated tunnel network of now solidified sand that went meters deep. The thunders static caused the Naru and Motoko's hair to stand up a bit, while they wondered if their choice had been foolish. _At least the girls are safe,_ Motoko thought after taking a quick glance their way. They had reached the foot of the cliff and were quickly scurrying up to the top. She couldn't find Seta or his charge. Her attention quickly went back to the statue when it shot the defenders a glare with an evil glint in its eyes.

"**Mew!**" it thundered once again. Motoko braced for impact, as had Naru, but what happened next seriously took them by surprise.

"Kyaa!" the two screamed after a sudden gust caused their 'fabrics' to go sailing with the wind.  
"Pervert!" the two said in unison and attacked in unison. The statue was sent flying off to the sunset, and exploded when it was a large distance away.

"Seta?" Naru asked quizzically when they found him standing just behind where the statue was moments before. "What are you doing there?"

"I was just sticking some C4 on the statue while it was busy with you two," he said. Naru realized her state of attire, as had Motoko and she sank to the ground, quickly covering herself. Motoko followed suit. Sarah, still perched on his shoulders, covered his eyes. It didn't do much to remove the crimson that now adorned both of the beauties' faces.

(O)

Tama was perched happily on top of Big Tama's shell. They were both happily nibbling on the food Shinobu had prepared for their big, 'romantic ,' dinner. She, Su, Sarah and Nyamo ran the romantic tropical island dinner until it was way past their bedtimes. (Big Tama showed Keitaro's stubbornness in constantly courting Tama-chan, even though she kept refusing him, but actually managed to get her to go out with him!)

Seta and his mentor talked about why he was missing and found that he'd been searching the oasis for some time till present because of the same tab let Naru had found. He had actually been looking for an amulet that was now in his possession that the turtle statue had been guarding, and he wouldn't have found it had he not woken up to find the girls in the stream he had been camping next to and scurried away before being caught. (He later showed his tent to them when they went back to Seta's van, which to their shock was very prominent and hard to miss.) Away from the lovers, Naru say dejectedly, staring into the moon-lit ocean before her.

"Don't give up on him yet, Naru," Kitsune said, sitting next to her.

"It's useless, Kitsune. Keitaro never came here. We just wasted out time and that baka's not getting into Todai again!" she said in a frustrated tone. She wrapped her arms around herself tighter, though there was no breeze blowing. Kitsune just sat by her quietly, staring at the ocean as the waves rolled by lazily.

(O)

(Hinata0sou, two days ago)

Ring! Ring!

The phone stood silent for a moment, but started chirping again.

"Alright, alright! I'll get it!" Haruka said in an annoyed tone. _Can't I get in any soaps without something always bugging me?_ Those damn police kept harassing her about some guy named Kentaro since the day the girls had all left.

"What?" she said angrily. _This had better be good…_ The sounds of the hustle bustle of a market could be heard in the background.

"Haruka-obasan—" the speaker started, but was sharply cut off by Haruka correcting, but saying, "Haruka-san."

_Wait a second…_ she thought when she recognized the exchange.

"Keitaro?"

(O)

Naru: Don't tell me that Keitaro was at the Perfecture all this time…

Me: Why would you say that?

Naru: Well, obviously it's Keitaro who called, so he must be nearby the Hinata-sou, or at least in Japan.

Me: Actually, it's his sister.

Naru: Bull. You're just saying that so you can surprise the readers next chapter.

Me: Really, I'm serious…

Naru: Whatever… Anyway, what was with all the Naru bashing! What do you have against me? Everything I do is well justified. That baka deserved everything I dished out to him!

Me: Sure. But that wasn't why I was bashing you…

Naru: Then why bash me so vehemently? Me, the pinnacle of Japanese femininity!

Me: Dude… I am so jealous of your punch.

Naru: (Speechless. After a while:) You want me to teach you?

Me: Sure! What's the secret?

Naru: This!

BAM

Author goes swimming with the fishes.

Nyamo: And thankyou all who cared to read this rubbish to read the latest installment of TSTBTPB. The author needs to update TOM soon.

Mario: I'm so glad this author won't mess with my life anymore than he already has.

Somewhere in a jail in the Philipines, Kentaro: Curse the author for making those turtles harass me!

(-O-)

I know… I need to update everything, and believe you me, I've been trying…

Well, that's the end of this trilogy. If you didn't like it… well, I'm sorry I've disappointed you. And for those of you who think that this will be a fluff, romance or comedy (as this trilogy seems to hint) remember that this fic is classified tragedy. Tell me if it doesn't though…

**And remember, click the 'Go' button. (Flames are understandable, especially if critical)**

**Cheers :**


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